Ravana the tawny eagle, Good Arn the Badger, 1 Trained Telmarine Armsmen arrive, following Ansel.

2 Pravus Honor Guard, Briar, a quiet young woman arrive, following Sebastian.

Maxene, the steadfast ladies maid, Pellinor, 3 Thrax Guards, 2 Thrax Elite Guards, a nameless overwrought highstrung pygmy goat arrive, following Alarissa.

Alarissa has rolled 1 5-sided dice: 4

Alarissa has rolled 1 4-sided dice: 4

Alarissa has rolled 1 5-sided dice: 2

A messenger arrives, delivering a message to Ansel before departing.

a nameless overwrought highstrung pygmy goat have been dismissed.

"Well. You're not the first ones to end up in here." A man's voice and filled with mirth comes from above you, even as Ansel feels something pebbly and rough, long and... prehensile, Digging in his ear. "Careful now. You're not a tree but she just might think your hair is tasty." Moisture left in the wake of that appendage inching across Ansel's face.

Across the ungulate fields everyone wakes up in various states of dressed and there's a distressed incessant bleating from under Monique where she is sprawled. Swift's mouth is this side of really sore, and there's wetness from the corner of her mouth, things tender. Ansel's side burns and things don't feel right

Speaking of tender, right cheeks or hips are tender. No, not that cheek. The other cheek. The sun filters through the trees and in the very cool crisp morning as awareness comes back to you one by one there's a distinct black hole of the night before. Heads hurt, mouths are dry and springing to mind are questions.
What is making that noise. Where is Rinel? Why are you all in torn but not dirty aeterna dresses, and why are you in the Ungulate fields of the menagerie....

What in the Abyss happened.

Maxene, the steadfast ladies maid, Pellinor, 3 Thrax Guards, 2 Thrax Elite Guards leave, following Alarissa.

Maxene, the steadfast ladies maid, Pellinor, 3 Thrax Guards, 2 Thrax Elite Guards arrive, following Alarissa.

Pellinor have been dismissed.

3 Thrax Guards have been dismissed.

2 Thrax Elite Guards have been dismissed.

Kit, the grey fox, Primus, First of Monique's Assistants, 1 Greenmarch Guard, Tertius, Third of Monique's Assistants, a nameless overwrought highstrung pygmy goat arrive, following Monique.

Ravana the tawny eagle have been dismissed.

Good Arn the Badger have been dismissed.

Swift checked intellect + investigation at difficulty 15, rolling 6 higher.

Sebastian checked intellect + investigation at difficulty 15, rolling 54 higher.

1 Trained Telmarine Armsmen have been dismissed.

Ansel checked intellect + investigation at difficulty 15, rolling 6 higher.

Monique checked wits + investigation at difficulty 15, rolling 43 higher.

Monique wakes up, clad in aeterna, sore all over and... there's a goat under her. A goat. Bleating. It's quite possibly the weirdest way the Minx of the Marches has ever woken up, and that's saying something. One hand gingerly goes to her head, a moan leaving her parted, parched lips. "Oh, blessed spirits, what in the Abyssal Hells..." She rolls. Tries to roll. It's made more difficult by the little pygmy goat, which she peers at through bleary, slitted eyes, fighting that sinking stomach feeling. She doesn't even look to see where she is yet, or where... friends? Were there friends involved? Click. Click. Awareness starts to trickle back in.

2 inflicted and Ansel is unharmed.

There's an old saying from the Silken City that has an elaborate, colorful story associated with it, but is best summed up as, 'Drinking Setarco Fire leads to Very Bad Decisions', and sometimes 'Results May Vary Wildly'. It's a truism that Sebastian, at least, is wholly familiar with, and should know better about -- but of course he still indulges, because it's Setarco Fire. But, one bottle in, someone decided it would be a great idea to drink Cardian Wine, too -- and that lead to, well... what? The face-down, drooling press of a Prince of Pravus into the dirt, one foot half-dangling into the stream. He makes a groaning sound, something like an attempt-and-fail at words, and the faintest of moment to indicate he's... alive, at least.

2 inflicted and Ansel is harmed for minor damage.

1 inflicted and Swift is harmed for minor damage.

There's something itching across Ansel's face and a hand lifts to give an idle little swat in that direction, even as an incoherent mumble comes to escape past his lips. Of course, it doesn't stop and there's a slow opening of an eye, followed by the other and it's then that the pain hits him. From multiple spots. One hand immediately falls down to his pelvis, fingers finding moisture lingering there and when he lifts that hand up, it's to catch the sight of red that graces his fingers, even as a wince dances across his features. There's another incoherent mumble that falls past the part of his lips and he hasn't even noticed that he's clad in asterna at this particular point.

Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! Not the first time Swift has woken up with aches and pains, but this is certainly the first time she's done so without being able to remember the night prior. Running a quick mental check, she ensures she seems to be intact, though a prod of her tongue is followed by a whimper when she realizes she's missing the better part of two teeth. Groping one hand about her, she finds nothing of her usual surroundings, instead finding grass and dirt and... what is she -wearing-?! Cracking her eyes open just a touch, getting that first retina-searing glance of morning light, Swift is quick to hiss and shades her eyes, giving a vague wonder as to why her hip/butt are aching as well. Trying to remember how the night even began.

There's laughter again, the caretaker of the giraffe - which is what is licking all over Ansel - just shakes his head. "You got ten minutes to get out of this field before I call the iron guard. I hope whatever it was, it was worth it."

The baby goat still bleats. Oh it's bleats. It's so shrill.

With the trickle of returned awareness comes the awareness of the weight of that baby pygmy goat tied to her, but also, the weight that is absent from her. And that's what really spurs Monique to full coherence. "MY DRAGONWEEP!" The Minx pats at herself, all over. The rings. The torques. The bracelets. The... well, everything. "No. Noooooooo," she moans, all but lost under the bleating of the goat trying to eat her aeterna in places it hasn't already. "Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo." Getting up while her world has just crumbled around her? Doesn't seem likely. Monique stays where she is on the grass, not quite weeping, but as if she's lost the will to go on without her shiny things.

With another groan of effort, Sebastian manages to lever himself up and over, so he's lying on his back, which -- given it's so bright, he squints painfully against. "Briar," comes his rough, croaky voice. "Wine. And some of that herbal medcine. Gods." And then there's a voice, bleating at him. And a goat, /actually/ bleating. It's enough to make him sit up, abruptly, a thing he sincerely regrets as the world spins, and he presses hands to his face until that ceases. His fingers part, and he squints through their shadowed cant, frowning. "Uhh..." he, too, is looking at what he's dressed in -- or not dressed in -- and the fine, colorful addition of a tuft of hair, which he holds up and squints at like it's the most puzzling piece of this whole thing.

A .. giraffe. There's a slight little recoil from Ansel, which does little more then aggrevate already existing pains, causing him to curse rather loudly. It takes him a moment or two to even manage to begin to unsprawl from being face down in the dirt to a somewhat more dignified sitting position. Or, rather, as dignified as one can look when wearing a dress. There is another groan, a combination of the blistering light, searing pain and the far too loud voice of the caretaker and that damn goat, which has him offering a rather soft little 'Shhh', as if that's all that it would take. Then there's Monique crying out and he can't help but grunt, "Shh. Not so loud." Fingers prod at his side, peeling back fabric to have a look, a little grimace taking hold as he examines the newfound wound and there's an almost puzzled little expression, but it's not for the wound, as is evidenced by the, "Gods .. a .. dress!?"

Gripping at the grass and ground with her fingers, Swift manages to pullherself up to a (mostly) upright position. She sways, rights herself suddenly, then winces at the pain that provokes. "Gods, why do I feel like I've been sucking on wool before its been washed and carded?" Blinking, eyes darting away from the east where the bright ball of hate rises, she mutters, "I need clove.. and peppermint.. feverfew... need to get to my bag... my.. bag, where's my bag? Where are my -clothes-?!" For the first time she seems to realize she isn't by herself, looking around as Ansel cries out, sparing a small chuckle for the Duke in a Dress, one she regrets as both mouth and head protest. "Nngh... okay... okay up.. we need to be up.. gotta get out. No Iron Guard.. don't need to get arrested." Ignoring the protests from within, she's pushing up to her feet, arms held out at her sides and fingers splayed, as if this will help her to find her balance amidst the spinning world.

Sebastian checked perception at difficulty 25, rolling 18 lower.

Ansel checked perception at difficulty 25, rolling 4 lower.

Swift checked perception at difficulty 25, rolling 4 higher.

Monique checked perception at difficulty 25, rolling 13 lower.

Something is coming through the woods, something large seeming, from all the noise that it's making. Just to the right.

Rinel Tern blasts through the shrubbery, wearing a torn and aeterna dress tailored in a style long out of fashion. Her hair is loose and matted with mud, sticks, and leaves.

"Demon!" she wails, heedless of exactly how stupid she looks. "Demon in the menagerie!" The theologian manages, somehow, to reach the group.

"Thought you ought to know," she manages weakly, before collapsing in a heap on the ground.

As if matters aren't already as bad as they could possibly be, the wreck of a human that is Monique without her jewels turns to the right, squinting in the face of all that awful sunlight. With exaggerated care, the Minx tries to summon the fortitude to rise, made complicated by the goat in a sling trying to eat her. "Sebastian?" her voice croaks out. "Sebas-" And she cuts off, confronted with the arrival of Rinel shouting about a... "... demon?" Monique does rise then, and a string of Shav invective leaves her lips.

Ansel is beginning to push himself to his feet after a moment, gaze playing over to Swift and then to Sebastion before looking back over towards Monique. It would seem that everyone is in the same sad state of affairs and when he looks back down at himself, there's another grimace as pain radiates through his torso. Struggling to his feet, he's once again investigating that pain, only to give a little grunt, "Someone tried to /skewer/ me." His hand presses to that spot, attempting to stem the pain, albeit successfully, and to try and limit the damage of moving about, "What .. /happened/." Pause. Slow turn of head towards noise. Loft of a brow, "Uh." Ow. There's that radiating pain in his head, still, "We've got probl.." Oh, then there's Rinel bursting forth from the shrubbery and going on about a demon .. only to collapse, "I hurt too much for this ..."

The hair Sebastian is clutching is probably the least weird thing right now in order of weird things. He seems more bemused than upset about the state of his clothes -- the aeterna dress he's now wearing -- though a grimace passes his features as he realizes he's lost both his signet ring, /and/ his favored sword. It's readily apparent his assistant is not coming to save him with a glass of something to wash down his dry throat, and after a moment, he leans towards the stream and starts cupping a handful of water to his mouth, then finally just splashes it over his face instead. "Mo--?" he turns bleary, squinted gaze her way -- recognition filtering in as he sees Swift, and then Ansel in equally improbable wear. A quiet chuckle begins -- and stops as he winces. "W-what?" he tries to focus, largely unsuccessfully, on Rinel. Given Ansel's actually made it to his feet, he lifts a hand towards the Duke in a silent plea for help to stand.

Swift checked dexterity + survival at difficulty 15, rolling 5 lower.

Not a demon. It's not a demon that comes bounding through the underbrush near the stream but the stag that's a resident of the Ungulate fields. It appears in a bursh of skewered green leaves with a bellow but doesn't go much further, his impressive rack swiveling this way and that as it takes in that it's no longer just Rinel, but Rinel and a few others. But he doesn't go away.

Maybe the caretaker was right. Time is swiftly counting down before he'll call for hte guard.

Already on her feet by grace of sheer luck, Swift stares blearily as Rinel comes running out of the shrubbery shrieking about demons. Practical Islander that she is, the freed Thrall staggers forth, peering into the woods at the approaching stag. "S'not a demon.. jus' a... ummmm.. big.. thingy.. they jump. have those.. aunt-ler things." She waves a hand raggedly even as she starts to stagger towards it, doing a terrible job of describing the stag. Instead, she sniffs and squats down, staring that deer right in the eyes as she looses her bladder. Its intended for the ground, but she may have misjudged as it ends up on her dress, too. Once finished, she rises, slowly, swaying, then stares at the stag. "Go 'way. Mine." Like its going to understand. Her business concluded, Swift swings herself around unsteadily and waves her arms at the gathered people. "C'mon. Gotta go. No Guard."

Monique is no stranger to stags, being, of course, Greenmarch's emblem. Unsteady on her feet, still the Minx ducks her crimson head, lowering it, taking very slow, very careful movements toward Rinel. "It's a stag. Don't meet its eyes. Don't give challenge, Swift. Just look down and back away and you'll be fine." All of this, punctuated by the bleating of the goat. "Rinel, what in the name of the Gods /happened/?" As if, surely, Rinel will be the source of reason here. "And why does my backside hurt so awfully?"

Ansel regards Sebastian with a momentary look of disbelief, as if he can't believe that the Prince is asking for his help. But, he does stagger over, albeit a bit wobbly and with a wince and he's offering his free hand to the downed man, giving a quick little grunt of, "Damnit. This is gonna hurt." His other hand remains pressed to his side, but when that stag appears, the Duke is looking over in that direction, a blink coming to be given and a little grunt, only to look back to Sebastian, "Hurry .. up."

Rinel stirs, then rolls over from where she has been lying face down in the dirt. Her eyes are glassy--while other people may be nursing hangovers, the Goodwoman Tern is not merely hung over but still, incredibly, somehow intoxicated. She giggles. "Probably had someone spank it. On account of you being pretty. People like to spank pretty things. Not sure why." Her head moves over to look at Ansel, and her eyes widen. "/You're/ pretty, too. You're the new Duke of the Telmarch. I grew up in the Telmarch. The old Duke was nice but he wasn't as pretty as you." The woman struggles to a half-sitting position and points unsteadily at Ansel. "You should marry someone and have lots of pretty babies." A thought, thick as treacle, slowly crawls into her mind, and she gapes in stupefied wonder. "You could marry Lady Monique."

With the Duke's help, Sebastian pushes to his feet with a groaning effort. He sways unevenly until he hastily grabs for Ansel's shoulder to steady himself. "Thank you, Duke Ansel," he says quietly with a genuine gratitude, his hand patting the man's shoulder gratefully before he lets it drop as soon as he feels steady enough. "Consider that a bottle of Buttercream earned--" the /hurry up/ gets a puzzled look. Passing a hand across his eyes, he blinks at the stag, and hearing Monique's advice, quickly looks away -- only to see Swift... taking care of business. He can't help the bark of laughter that comes, nor the wince that quickly follows. "Gods, I need a bath. And some wine. Whose place is closest?" He starts to stagger for what he assumes -- hopes -- is the exit. Largely away from the stag, anyway.

Front hoofs paw at the ground, the act by swift to pee on the ground - and subsequently herself - may or may not be successful. Maybe Monique's instructions to give respect to the stag, not challenge it by looking it in the eye is what works, but the stag doesn't move forward. He stands his ground with a huff of warning from the deer. He's not going anywhere. So they better. Drunken or hungover alike. As if to punctuate that, he takes a step forward and bellows a warning.

"Shhh," Sebastian tells the deer, as if offended by the noise.

"Gilded Page is closest... then, uhhhhhhhh.. Lycene Ward. Pravus is still there til it gets figured..." Swift flaps a hand around as if to encompass Pravus' rise to power and outgrowing their former liege in a single gesture. That gesture then encompasses RInel, "Maybe her place next? Then Valardin ward.. My place is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay on the other side of the city." She blinks, "But nobody will care what we look like. Mags will probably think its funny."

"Later. You can make good on that later," is what Ansel offers to Sebastian, a wince coming at the pat to his shoulder, "Ow. Don't. It's hard enough to move without being patted upon." He hasn't even begun to investigate the other pains, the skewering having been enough to keep him focused on that. His hand remains pressed there and he's turning, only to then catch Rinel's remark, a low chuckle coming to be offered, which was clearly a mistake for his cuts it short with a little groan, "Don't have to tell me how pretty I am. But we can have that conversation after we leave." And then he's making like Sebastien .. or rather, following the Prince.

Monique blinks down at Rinel. And blinks again. Her mouth hangs open. And then she squints, even further. "Are you /still drunk/?" the Minx echoes, punctuated by the goat bleating. She stretches a hand out to Rinel. "Come on. I know the trouble you get into even when you're not. Let's get you out of here before you're asking the Gods to marry us all on sight. Everyone okay to go?" She's looking around even as she backs away and towards... well, it's hard to tell, but what she /thinks/ is the exit. "Valardin ward. I /think/ we have a goat to return..."

BLEAAAAAT goes the goat.

"I live in the Upper Borrows. Burrow. Boroughs. Hard to say. But my washtub won't fit all of you, and neither will my bed." She is hoisted up into a standing position and promptly *flumps* against Monique. Her breath reeks of alcohol. "Wouldn't mind some of you in it, though," she says, giggling. "I hear that's the Lycene way of doing things. We could play make-believe."

Yep. She's still drunk.

2 Pravus Honor Guard, Briar, a quiet young woman leave, following Sebastian.

Kit, the grey fox, Primus, First of Monique's Assistants, 1 Greenmarch Guard, Tertius, Third of Monique's Assistants, a nameless overwrought highstrung pygmy goat leave, following Monique.

Maxene, the steadfast ladies maid, Ansel, Sebastian, Monique, Swift, Rinel leave, following Alarissa.

Oh what a sight this little group makes. Sure to get tongues wagging and more than a few raised brows especially in the Valardin ward. A duke, wiht an injury. Swift with a few missing teeth, Monique with that baby goat in a sling and all of them in aeterna dresses that are perhaps just a hair out of season or more. But given that at least two of them -belong- in the ward, no one is stopped at the gates to it and soon enough they arrive at cavalier place where the distant sounds of animals that seem to pervade the place that indicated the Keaton residence is nearby, as well as other places there, can be heard.

The whole way, Sebastian is clutching a weirdly colorful scrap of hair. The more he walks, the more he realizes he's startlingly sober, and this presents all sorts of problems, not just with the painful pull of /something/ that happened on his hip, but the pounding of his head and the brightness of the day, and all the loud noises, and the people staring. It's just too much. His leaden steps take him to Monique's side, ostensibly to help her, but in readily to give him something to lean on. He must be hungover if he's so casually using the Minx of the Marches as a leaning post -- but then, she has no knives to threaten him with... right?

A messenger arrives, delivering a message to Rinel before departing.

Monique does admirably, not discouraging Rinel's flirtatious advances. She is a terrible Minx, after all, and it makes the ignominous walk to the Valardin ward bearable to hold a detailed discussion on just how the Lycene do it, in Rinel's mind, and perhaps to get revenge on Sebastian for forcing her to hold both goat and hungover Lycene. But as they near the Keaton residence, the Greenmarch holding the goat starts to drag her heels. "We need to do two things. Return the goat, and ask the stable hands what they might've seen. Ansel, maybe you should return the goat..." Because someone doesn't want to face Reigna.

Monique also shifts the goat closer to Sebastian, and the adorable bundle of bleat tries to nibble at the hair the Pravus Prince holds.

Rinel is leaning very heavily into Monique. Who can blame her? Monique /is/ pretty. Rinel /is/ drunk. And then the messenger arrives. Rinel peers blearily at the contents of the missive. Suddenly, her face breaks into a radiant smile. "It's Archlector Brigida's goat!"

There's a long, long pause.

"...it's Archlector Brigida's goat," she repeats in a whisper, eyes wide with horror.

As he's asked to return the goat, Ansel's giving a grunt and a little shake of his head, "No. You can return the goat. I'm not carrying anything, at least not until I get my side patched up." A little grunt and he's taking a look around the area and then down to himself and then around the area and then over to the others, "And as lovely as I look in a dress, I'm not entirely certain that returning the goat in it is going to garner the kinda of support we want to answer questions." When Rinel announces just whose goat it is, there's a little groan and another shake of his head, "You can most certainly return it now, Mo." He's at least stumbling along on his power, albeit still a bit wobbly. Between the pai at his pelvis, his cheek and his head, it's a rather admirable attempt. Though the dress does happen to detract from it all.

"I'll do it." Swift had been almost unusually quiet the entire trip up from the Menagerie, letting things turn over and over in her head as they walk. Trying to remember what happened the night before. Trying to remember how her teeth became broken. Anything. She clears her throat, winces. Then blinks. "Wait wha... who?" Looking confused over the turn of events, her eyes turn from person to person before landing on Rinel. "So.. is it not here? More walking? Can we... can we like.. change first? Please? If someone has access to herbs here I can make some poultices... we can.. clean up?"

"Three things," Sebastian corrects, as he leans into a convenient wall the moment they stop, sparing Monique his presence, not out of nicety but to try and avoid that loud goat and his bleating. "Four things, if you count wine," which he does. He starts to hold up the tuft of hair, only to belatedly realize the goat is trying to eat it. "No! Bad goat," he scowls. "The last thing we need is for you to turn into a unico-- oh!" his eyes widen. Then, "/Oh,/" with a kind of dread.

Monique stares in silence at Rinel. It's a long, terrible silence. "Well, maybe we just pretend we don't have it..." the Minx begins, looking toward first Sebastian, then Swift, then Ansel. "Maybe it just... goes away. Anyone hungry? Greenmarch Lodge isn't far..."

Rinel checked charm + manipulation at difficulty 30, rolling 8 lower.

"Unicorn goat, unicorn goat, has a big horn, likes to go... float," Rinel sings in a very stupid voice. She laughs. "Maybe if we turn Daisy into a unicorn then Blessed Brigida won't be upset with us." But her eyes widen as Monique suggests pretending the creature doesn't exist. The woman clings to the Minx of the Marches and gives her puppy eyes. "But Daisy will get lost!" she says, horrified.

"I doubt it .." is what Ansel offers, only to then give a nod of his head towards Monique, "Greenmarch is fine. Or Telmar Tower. They are all close enough." A look to Sebastian, a loft of a brow and a low chuckle comes to pass, "No. No unicorn." Then he's looking to Swift, "I agree. Changing first. Cleaning up, too." His gaze then turns to Rinel and he's moving to shamble along a little more, the odd wince coming to be given as he does so, "How are /you/ the only one who managed to stay drunk?"

"No, there was a--" Sebastian grimaces as he glances at Ansel, "There was a unicorn. I'm sure of it," he says, frowning. "I'm happy with this plan," Sebastian wholeheartedly agrees with Monique. "Though my stomach might need to settle first before we--" He stares at Rinel for a moment, somewhere between concerned and pitying. "Maybe you can... take the goat back. You seems to know who it belongs to."

"Did I headbutt it? Because it feels like maybe I headbutted it..." Swift asks about the unicorn that apparently appeared at some point. She glances around the group then sighs, "Go Telmar. He needs to be stitched. We need to be cleaned. And remedied. And.. evrythinged."

"Telmar, then," Monique says, sighing heavily, shifting the goat away from Sebastian as it tries to headbutt him, giving an angry bleat. "We cannot send Rinel to Brigida drunk, with a goat. We'll all have to go. But let's get cleaned first. Someone is going to have to look at my backside."

Swift lets out a small burst of laughter, then immediately regrets it. "Heheh."

Sebastian's mouth parts, caught between surprise and laughter. Fortunately for his headache, the former wins. "I... don't remember," he tells Swift. "But also, I wouldn't be surprised." He, too, laughs at Monique's plea, and likewise immediately regrets it with a soft groan.

"Telmar it is," is what Ansel offers with a little grunt, only to chuckle at Monique's comment, a brow lofting, "Your backside hurting too? Great." Looking to the others, he's then lifting his free hand to give a little wriggle of fingers, indicating that they should follow along in the shamble stumble along.

Rinel gasps. "The Red Keep!" And then, "Wait, no, that is far away. We have to go to the Telmar /Mansion/," she informs the others solemnly. The scholar is, as always, very learned. To Ansel, she says proudly, "I am a /good Oathlander/. I do not drink! So when I do drink, it is like I am having all the drinks that I have never had, and so I get stupid for a little bit. But I am fine right now! I am very fine."

Her words are slightly slurred.

2 Pravus Honor Guard, Briar, a quiet young woman leave, following Sebastian.

Kit, the grey fox, Primus, First of Monique's Assistants, 1 Greenmarch Guard, Tertius, Third of Monique's Assistants, a nameless overwrought highstrung pygmy goat leave, following Monique.

Maxene, the steadfast ladies maid, Ansel, Sebastian, Monique, Swift, Rinel leave, following Alarissa.

Monique follows after Ansel, still working to keep Rinel upright, and Sebastian too. "Yes, Rinel. You're just fine. Everything is fine. We do things like this every day. Certainly not like when we first met, and you tried to attack me with a broom. Do you know, this is the room I got married in?" She points out to Rinel, amusement quirking her lips even as she releases the others to reach for the material of her somewhat-chewed-on aeterna gown, starting to bunch it up, entirely without inhibition.

Through this all there is bleating. And when it boils down to it, the fear of Reigna is perhaps stronger than that of Brigida? Or is the fear of Brigida stronger than that of Reigna? Only these people who push this bleating baby pygmy goat between each other really know but in the end one thing is certain, they're not facing either of them without being in something else, and cleaned up.

And so to the Duke's home they go, clothing found for guests and baths to be had for all. Ansel soon finds himself tended to by Swift and others in the house while Sebastian is blessedly shown where the booze is. Swift gets a good look at her mouth in a mirror to find a chipped and broken tooth while another is missing entirely.

And to the war room they descend, once cleaned up with thier clues in the unicorn hair, the goat and those dresses and... the collective smarting cheeks.

Upon arriving in the Tower, the first thing that Ansel does is dispatch staff for clothing and the like, followed by arranging for everyone to be able to get cleaned up. Booze is provided via a plethora of bottles on the second level of the War Room, to aide in dealing with those pesky hangovers and when Monique speaks, there's a low chuckle in the back of his throat and a little shake of his head, "Alright. Once we're all sorted and the like, we'll get that goat back to where it belongs and then try and figure out where the heck all our stuff is gone."

Rinel checked willpower + medicine at difficulty 30, rolling 13 higher.

From the baths, there is a sudden wailing. "Get it off! I don't want a unicorn on me! It's going to bite me! They're mean! Get it oooooff!"

The wailing is, predictably, Rinel.

Later, she staggers into the war room, aided by a very long-suffering servant. The woman looks despondent. Both women look despondent. "I need a drink," Rinel announces miserably. "I have been marred." And so she staggers to the booze, pours herself whisky until half the glass is full, and drinks the entire thing as if it were water.

There is a horrified silence.

"What?" she asks the servants. "This is like medicine. Trust me. I am a /Physician/."

It's nice to have clean clothes. It's much, much nicer to have a fresh glass of wine to wash down the horrid after-taste of too much of another type of wine. Sebastian is all about low-key fixes to terrible hangovers. It's telling that he doesn't even make anyone else taste the wine before he gulps down most of the contents of the glass, slumping into a chair -- and then immediately wincing and twisting to shamelessly pull down the fresh pair of pants he's acquired -- and stop. For a moment he's silent -- and then he looks over towards Monique, because of course he does -- and that's when he's stunned reaction turns into gulped semi-hysterical laughter.

Monique checked composure at difficulty 15, rolling 4 lower.

"What? What is it? /What/?" Is Monique's ire-filled reaction to Sebastian, clearly not used to having anyone /laugh/ at her nakedness. "Do I have a scar? What have you been marred with, Rinel?" Her eyes slide to Sebastian in turn, unable to help the direction of her gaze. "You... oh. Oh, my. You're /ruined/."

Bathing quickly, Swift takes whatever clothing is given her, then immediately goes to tend to the gash Ansel's garnered. While getting him fixed up, she manages to discover something.. interesting. "My lord. Do you... that is. Did you realize you have a tattoo? Its a rather ugly-looking horse with a horn on its head..." She pauses, shifting slightly from one side to another, "Its eyes are following me..." Blinking, she shakes her head and quickly moves to the other side of the decidedly creepy mark so she can finish tending the wound. Once done, she steps back and clears her throat, "I have done all I can. The, uh... the tattoo is.. permanent. I'm afraid. Nothing to be done for it." She flashes him an apologetic smile that looks a bit strange with the broken and missing teeth, then hurries along to see to precisely that. Concocting a round of hangover remedies while she's at it. Carrying them into the War Room just in time for Rinel to gulp down whiskey, and Sebastian to bare his butt to the room at large. "Are we certain that this isn't some sort of very vivid.. shared hallucination? I... I feel like I'm trip-sitting for the family..."

It's only when his own tattoo is pointed out that there's a rather large bellow in the form of a curse and it's rather obvious that it belongs to Ansel. When he finally does make his return to the war room, at least clad in new, fresh clothes and not bleeding all over them, it's in time for Sebastian to make his reveal and there's a groan and a shake of his head, "It would seem that we all got the same .. mark." His gaze plays to Monique, eyes narrowing a bit, albeit a touch playful, "This is your doing, isn't it, Mo?"

Rinel points at Sebastian. "I have the same!" she proclaims dramatically, flinging her hand about. A nervous and careful servant manages to extricate the drained whisky tumbler before anything can happen. And then--"Yes! The Minx of the Marches!" Rinel strides confidently over to Monique. Well, she stumbles confidently.

Well. She manages to get to Monique.

"Trickery!"

Rinel checked wits at difficulty 7, rolling 16 higher.

Ansel checked wits at difficulty 7, rolling 8 higher.

Monique checked wits at difficulty 7, rolling 28 higher. Monique rolled a critical!

It takes a bit for Sebastian's laughter to subside, and the only thing that does it is the look on Monique's face. "Yours is the same, Mo... sort of?" he squints, trying to figure out in half-hungover fashion how best to frame words that avoid the possibility of him being garrotted. "Sort of half... done. Maybe you can get someone to fix it into something... better?" He clears his throat, reaching for a bottle to refill his glass. "Some hallucination," he mutters as he drinks.

Swift checked wits at difficulty 7, rolling 12 higher.

Sebastian checked wits at difficulty 7, rolling 1 higher.

114Something in remembered at Rinel'ss tumble, that confidant stride that's spurred on by risidual alcohol, oh so fleeting. Of a Rinel Tern standing on top of the Murder of Crows bar, a bottle - not wine - in hand and it lifted high and the women yelling out 'UNICORN TATTOO'S! WE NEED TO GET UNICORN TATTOO's!"

Monique tries to crane a look over her shoulder, but before she can, there's a Rinel and her gown is dropped in favor of catching the woman before she trips into her and the goat. And there's that awful sense of deja vu dawning upon the Minx of the Marches at the accusation. "This wasn't /me/! This was /YOU/! And if there wasn't a goat tied around my neck I'd throttle you! I might still! I'm marred for like," the Minx bemoans dramatically.

Rinel shouts from nearby, "Unicorns are pretty!"

Monique pats herself down for a dagger, and finds none.

"Its not as bad as all that... there are artists, they work specifically in ink. You can find a lot of them in the Isles. Its very fixable. Or at least... cover-able." Swift offers between the shouting before sidling over to where Sebastian is sitting, putting herself out of the line of fire. She offers him one of the remedies and watches with the sort of fascination of a carriage wreck. One can't help but to stare at the carnage. "The Duke has one too," is offered in an aside to the Pravosi Prince, perhaps to help him feel better about his own tattoo. "I suggest not looking at it too long. The eyes start to follow you." She lifts one of the glasses to sip at her own remedy.

There's not one drink, not two drinks but three taken by Ansel as if to both tend to that hangover and help make the horrid dream that he's encountering go away. When the third is finished and things are still vividly real, there's a grunt and a shake of his head in the direction of the others. It's then that he seems to recall something and as Monique growls at Rinel, there's a growl of the Duke's own towards her, "You! You are the reason we have these cursed things!" At least he doesn't lunge at her. But he does lift a hand to make a fist, to give it a shake in her direction, "Mo's fault for making us drink too much, though. That much is obvious."

Rinel tries a new tactic. "Don't be mad at me," she says to Monique, giving her wooblie eyes. "It was the wine. I can't drink wine. It makes me stupid. Especially Cardian wine. I become draconically stupid. That's /very/ stupid." Then she tries to give Monique a big, drunken hug. "/Unicorn friends/."

Belatedly, Sebastian remembers to pull up his pants, and takes the remedy Swift offers, if with a grimace -- as if anticipating the awful taste. He manages to get it down, chased with wine, though. "That does not make me feel better," he tells Swift, giving Ansel a sympathetic look, too. And then the comments directed at Rinel seem to dislodge something in his head, and he stares -- squints at her -- on the verge of glaring. Glaring is painful, and he gives up the staring, too, after a moment, sighing. "Should we go return this goat, and then find out why the unicorns? I think I know where to go for that. The Lodge of Petrichor."

Monique glares daggers at Ansel. "Me! How dare you! I bought this wine with Swift! So clearly, if there's blame there, it's shared." She drags the Grayhope into it willingly. "And, might I point out, /DUKE OF TELMAR/, that you're fully capable of making your own decisions!" And then she's being embraced by Rinel, and the goat doesn't like that /at all/. It bites at Rinel, and has Monique nodding her emphatic agreement with Sebastian. "Please."

BLEAAAAAAT.

"I'm easily influenced by the prospect of booze," is what Ansel offers to Monique, only to then offer a smile, "And you damn well know it." That smile lingers and then he's looking amongst the others that have gathered, only tot hen give a nod of his head, "Lets go return that goat, before the rest of the Tower wonders what is going on."

2 Pravus Honor Guard, Briar, a quiet young woman leave, following Sebastian.

Kit, the grey fox, Primus, First of Monique's Assistants, 1 Greenmarch Guard, Tertius, Third of Monique's Assistants, a nameless overwrought highstrung pygmy goat leave, following Monique.

Maxene, the steadfast ladies maid, Ansel, Sebastian, Monique, Swift, Rinel leave, following Alarissa.

The trip through the city was certainly an interesting one. More so when they went through the city center. It's not -often- that commoners that don't owe fealty to a noble will actually go out of their way to be kind if not outright -friendly- to a noble. Respectful at a minimum, civil sure. But as they travel, Ansel, the Duke of Telmar is being lauded. Applauded. There's a few hungover commoners who are dealing with their own need for hair of a dog. But Ansel is like unto a god to the commoner populace at the moment. Odd.

And as they move through the city further toward the gates that will eventually get them toward the Lodge, there's a Iron Guardsman whose eyes widen at the sight of them and scurries off. Swiftly. Sebastian is given the longest look by them. But they're long gone before any iron guardsman can further stop them and as they make their way to the lodge, that baby goat in the sling around Monique's shoulders is still bleating between bites of whatever they can shove in it's mouth.

Something happened here. A wagon with the sigil of the Iron Guard into the side is resting near the entrance to the grove of Renewal, a wagon wheel looking... like something hit it. The gates to the lodge itself look to have had the lock broken and there are tatters and strips of aeterna everywhere. Trampled grass, trampled shrubbery and as they head toward where Brigida supposedly waits, everyone has a sinking feeling in their stomach... Though the grove of renewal itself looks fairly.... kempt. Like nothing happened in there.

Swift checked perception at difficulty 20, rolling 4 higher.

Rinel checked perception at difficulty 20, rolling 8 higher.

Monique checked perception at difficulty 20, rolling 10 lower.

Ansel checked perception at difficulty 20, rolling 13 lower.

Sebastian checked perception at difficulty 20, rolling 3 lower.

All is peaceful in the Grove of Renewel at the present. Currently in the open space in the centre of the trees is the white robed figure of Blessed Brigida, Archlector of Petrichor, Iron Thorn of Arx and... her pig Oswald. Oswald is currently drafted as a pillow for Brigida as her eyes are closed.

Rinel is humming merrily, now, only slightly off-tune, leaning on /Ansel/ this time. "Are you married?" she's asking him, now. "You should be married. To Lady Greenmarch! Like I said earlier. She used to be married but isn't anymore. Then you can be Telgreenmarchers. Very important. That's strategy, you know. I read it in a book. In the Archives. About strategy. Did you know that Lord Petrichor likes druids? That's a good thing, for me."

"Oh! Look! A tooth! Someone was missing a tooth." She moves to get the tooth. She ends up falling over. But she raises it triumphantly. "Tooth friends!" she declares, beaming.

Brigida twitches slightly at the loud voices.

Monique isn't going first. That much is clear. She lingers and loiters and tries frantically to shut the damn goat up. "You're fine. It's fine. I already married into Telmar once, Rinel. Here, you carry the goat," the Minx of the Marches offers to the poor, drunken Rinel, before realizing that Rinel has tumbled down and found a tooth. "Sebastian? Take the goat? Ansel? Goat?"

The walk is an odd one and Ansel is giving commoners and people a rather .. odd look at the attention he receives, only to then look towards his 'companions' with a lofted brow, "Anyone know what that is about?" And somewhere along the way, he aquired himself as Rinel, who is leaning on him and he's forced to support with an arm as he gives a chuckle, "I am married. And the Lady Greenmarch is quite happy, I'm certain." And when Rinel takes her spill, there's a little shake of his head and he's moving to help her up, even as his attention shifts to Monique, "That's all on you, Mo."

Sebastian is wholly oblivious to the look from the Iron Guard. In truth, he's too used to getting looks for all sorts of reasons -- for being a Pravus, for being an artist, for just being /him/ -- that it doesn't even seem to register. "By the Gods, someone sacrifice something to that goat to eat so it'll stop bleating for five minutes," the Pravus is practically begging. He holds his hands up in a warding gesture when Monique tries to unload it onto him: "Hells no!" He's definitely no longer leaning on Monique -- in fact trying to keep his distance since she's the source of the horrible noise. His eyes are bloodshot and gaze somewhat unfocused still, the after effects of a killer hangover readily apparent, even if he's wearing clean clothes now at least. He stares in a kind of non-focused way at the destruction, not really registering it.

Swift claims the tooth from Rinel with a gapped smile, "That would be mine, my dear. Thank you." The tooth itself is tucked into a pocket as she eyes the Iron Guard wagon with a frown. As if trying to suss out what might have happened to cause it. Shaking her head, she sighs and moves along. She'll even take lead, having no clue why everyone is afraid of the nice-looking lady napping on the fat pig. "This is who you're all afraid of? But she looks... sweet." Blinking, Swift shrugs and heads towards her. Even lifts a hand in greeting, "Hello! Hello? I think we have your goat!"

"Well," Rinel declares to Monique, wobbling to her feet--were those stones under her feet always there? They're supporting her in just the right way for her to stagger upright. "If /I/ were a nobleman, I'd marry you. Even if you are a bandit queen." She nods. And then Swift is talking, and Rinel is flailing after her--"hsst! hsstt! no no no no no no no no!" she hisses, in abject panic--and now she's on the ground again. "Ow."

The horse that once pulled the wagon turns up with Mirk, leading it into the Grove of Renewal, one hand in its reins, the other hand rubbing the horse's back, as if trying to build rapport with the unfamiliar animal. "Come along," he's urging the horse, though he's not dressed for riding. He slows once he sees the situation and the others involved. "What in the..." He blinks, trails off, and looks to the group, then heads over towards them with the horse. "I don't suppose it was one of you that lost a horse?"

BLEAAAAT

When Swift makes her way over towards Brigida, there's a little blink from Ansel and a quick shake of his head. His gaze is then turning back to Rinel when she falls once more and he's moving to help her up, offering a little, "Shh." Then, it's back over towards Monique, only for him to wince at hte bleaat from the goat, "Go on, Mo. Go set it free." The mention of a lost horse has him looking towards Mirk and there's a little blink, a loft of a brow and he's looking amongst the others.

"What /happened/..." Monique mutters ay Ansel from beneath the incessant bleat of the goat, trying frantically to put two and two together. "People only get that happy with you if you've given them free booze. We know we were at the Murder. Ansel, you must have given out rounds. Many rounds. You ought to check your accounts or check at the Murder next..." And then the Minx spies Mirk, and her face falls further. "No. Not my horse." Definitely not involved. No way. She won't meet his eyes. And it's only when Swift starts towards Brigida that the Greenmarch looks up, horror etched likewise on her own face.

There is another twitch from the Archlector as Swift approaches, speaking faaaaar too loudly.

Then there is the BLEAAAAT and the presence of Swift right there on top of Brigida.

THWACK!

The staff is suddenly swung out fast and at shin level, painfully hard, as the eyes of Brigida flick open.

"What in Petrichor's Posterior is with all the noise!" Another whack follows.

THWACK!

"Save yourselves!" cries Rinel, as she scampers into a nearby bush.

Her feet are still visible outside of it.

"Oh!" Sebastian half-turns when Mirk mentions a lost horse. "I think there might've been an incident with a--" he digs in his pocket and pulls out a multi-colored tuft of hair. "--unicorn." He squints at Mirk's horse, and shakes his head. "No, I think this one is more..." he frowns. "Unicorn-y." For a moment, all Sebastian can do is turn to watch Swift's approach to Brigida as one might watch a tiny mouse approaching a sleeping cat. "Um," he starts to exhale, then seems to think better of intervening, when those loud thwacks start. He visibly winces and takes a step back behind Ansel.

"This one isn't mine," Mirk says in a dry tone, shaking his head at Sebastian. "Found it wandering around nearby, and I'm guessing..." He squints at the bleating goat, then winces in sympathy as Swift gets thwacked by Brigida. "Is it truly necessary to antagonize the Archlector in a Grove, of all places?" He asks in a deadpan tone. "For that matter, I seem to have missed a few steps somewhere along the way, here."

"OWWWWWWWWWWW!" That thwack does NOT have the intended effect. If anything, Swift gets louder when hit with that cane. "Dammit woman! I'm just trying to return your goat! OW, STOP IT!"

She knows how to beat this, she walks CLOSER to Brigida, limiting the range of that swing, limping up her cane-side and leaning over to rub at her poor shins. "Look lady, I have already lost a tooth, gotten a tattoo of a creature I've never seen, and I've managed to lose all my clothes, my bag with my herbs and poultices, and Gods only know what else! Can you please just take the goat back so it will stop its incessant bleating??"

Brigida checked command + intimidation at difficulty 15, rolling 69 higher.

"Must be what happened," is what Ansel grunts to Monique with a little shake of his head, only to then blink as Rinel dives into a bush. Then, Swift is being twacked and there's a twitch of his brow. He doesn't even notice Sebastian trying to hide behind him and there's another twitch of his brow at Swift's tone with Brigida. Which, of course, has him clearing his throat and calling out, "Hey Swift. Come on back over here. Might be a little .. safer that way." At least he's not yelling it out.

Ble-

The goat stops bleating as Brigida's bellow.

That's good! Sebastian nods approvingly at Swift's pleading tones, and then seems to regret it a moment later with a grimace. "A little too much Setarco Fire, followed by a delightful chaser of Cardian Wine," the Pravosi starts to explain to Mirk, with a grimace, his voice quiet. "You haven't, uh... seen a pile of finery around here? Clothes, jewels, weapons?" he asks, hopefully. That shirt he's wearing looks a little too baggy to be his, unless he's setting a new style trend.

"Rinel, come out of there," Monique hisses to the other woman, as she strugles to untie the sling around her neck that carries the baby goat. "It's finally quiet. Help me get rid of it! Then we can figure out what Sebastian has done here to this poor cart. Did you see the looks the Iron Guard were giving him? He's trouble," she says, the picture of innocense.

"Passed a few saddlebags back there," Mirk says to Sebastian, jerking his thumb towards the underbrush back the way he came. "Looked to be stuffed to the brim. I didn't take a good luck at what, since I was focused on getting the horse back to where it came from. You're sure it's not your horse?" He raises an eyebrow at Sebastian, as if encouraging him to accept the animal from him. "Why is there a goat? Alcohol only explains so much."

There's a rustle as the two feet disappear into the bush. A moment later, a small brown face pops up out of the shrubbery. "I found my bag!" Rinel announces in delight. "And I didn't even spill a bit of ink. That's proper scholar training, right there." She slowly extricates her way from the plants. "Ouch. Ouch. Ouch." Then she's by Monique's side and helping her with the goat. "Hello, Lord Halfshav!" she calls out happily. She looks incredibly drunk. She sounds incredibly drunk. "We had wine from Cardia, and then whisky from... somewhere? And then some brandy. And then some wine. And then some ale. And cider! I like cider. And then we had..." She screws up her face, thinking. "What do they serve at the Murder?" she asks Monique.

Oh. Brigida's eyes narrow into a cold stare when she is addressed as 'woman' and 'lady'. There is a sudden chill in the Grove...which is probably caused by... the sun momentarily disappearing behind a cloud... Probably. Brigida is an expert it seems at using her staff (not a cane as only the elderly and infirm use canes) to discipline people at a variety of distances. She sits up, holds the staff nearer the top and raps Swift on the head once with it!

"If you do not explain yourself this VERY instance I will make sure that you will consider losing all your teeth and clothes is a blessing!" Her gaze looks over the rest of the group, baleful and angry. "Explain. NOW!"

Rinel immediately points to Monique. "She did it."

Rinel checked luck at difficulty 7, rolling 1 higher.

Monique checked composure at difficulty 15, rolling 4 higher.

Mirk checked composure at difficulty 15, rolling 21 higher.

"What? I didn't do anything," Sebastian declares his innocence with a lift of his chin in Monique's direction, which is unfortunate because it exposes his gaze to the very-bright sun, earning a painful intake of breath as he quickly squints. Mirk's answer has him brightening, though. "Oh, great. Uh... no, I don't think so," he looks at the horse, but it doesn't exceptionally familiar. "Which way?" he looks like he's going to pick 'inspect the non-cane-wielding-and-now-yelling saddle bags' in deference to staying in range of that loud voice.

Sebastian checked luck at difficulty 7, rolling 21 higher.

Ansel checked luck at difficulty 7, rolling 1 higher.

Monique checked luck at difficulty 15, rolling 9 lower.

"Cardian wine," Mirk repeats the phrase, now that it's mentioned again. "I cannot imagine why anyone would think that's a good idea." Between Rinel and Brigida, he blinks a couple of times, and manages to keep a straight face. But it's clearly a struggle. The amusement is there in his eyes. He successfully resists the urge by helping Sebastian. He points off into the distance for Sebastian, and says, "Scattered about. Head through the underbrush, and I don't think you'll be able to miss it. Just try not to get that shirt caught on anything, Your Highness."

Monique checked luck at difficulty 7, rolling 5 lower.

"OW! Would you STOP that! I don't know who you are, but this is the sort of thing that gets you jailed, you know! You can't just go around abusing people because you feel crabby!" Swift manages to shout as she now covers her head, with both arms after getting knocked on the top of the head with that staff. Falling back onto her butt, she cries out as she lands on that tattoo and rolls immediately to her side. "I just DID that! We're trying to bring back your goat! You seem to have lost it at some point last night and we seem to have found it! So take it back already!"

Ansel is looking to Monique, the goat, then to Brigida and he's turning so as to look to Mirk, "Right. Which way did you see the stuff?" It seems he's going to let Monique return that goat and explain it's ... presence in the sling. A soft sigh and he's looking to Sebastian, "Why don't you grab it all and bring it back for us?" Then, he's turning to Brigida, only to offer a slight incline of his head towards her, only to let his eyes shift to Swift and then back to Brigida, "Archlector, I apologize for the disruption and intrusion. We seem to have found ourselves in the company of what is your goat and we were seeking to return it to you, as Mistress Swift has said."

Monique glares at Rinel. "You'll have to find someone else to warm your bed now," the Minx huffs, /finally/ succeeding in untying the knot that cradles the goat to her. Of course, she didn't have the mothering instinct to lower herself to the ground before she did it, and there is a tumble of flailing goat that falls to the ground. Kids are resilient, right?

Brigida stops beating on Swift and wrinkles form in her features as she frowns and looks at the newly revealed goat.

"That's not my goat."

"As if you wouldn't have done the same," Rinel huffs. "Besides, you're married." She crosses her arms and glares petulantly at Monique.

"THAT'S my goat!" She finishes as Daisy wanders in from behind a tree, chewing on some dandilions

The news that their things are scattered about isn't great, to judge by Sebastian's expression. But that hair-of-the-dog has at least served to wake him enough to habitually respond to Mirk, "My thanks, my lord." He glances down at his too-big shirt, grimacing. "Yeah, I--" and then Ansel's suggestion is made, and he grimaces. "I don't think I can--" he starts, and gives up. In a choice between an angry Brigida and clambering through the woods -- yeah, the prince is going survival mode, albeit with lots of stumbling and loud thumps that suggest he's probably scaring off everything in the vicinity.

BLEEEAT

The little tiny goat - really, next to daisy, where she runs, it's easy to see that this is a baaaaaaaby goat - rambles up to Daisy on unsteady legs.

Swift gets back to her feet, the flat of one hand rubbing lightly at the top of her head. There's a moment, perhaps two, where she's staring at the staff in Brigida's hand as if contemplating taking it from her and perhaps giving the older woman a few whacks of her own. "You could have just said so WITHOUT beating on. Jayus wept, how has someone not carted you off to the Guard yet under charges of assault?" She limps her way back towards the others and shakes her head. Muttering under her breath, possibly further invectives about crazy old women and their walking sticks, she pauses to offer a brief glare at her 'companions', "Cowards." Then she continues back towards the wagon so she can try to figure out what happened.

"I'm not married!" Monique huffs her exasperation at Rinel, placing her hands on her hips. Only to drop them when Brigida announces that the goat is not hers. Something in the Greenmarch snaps. "Then what in the name of all that is holy happened here!" the Minx demands of Brigida, forgetting herself, shouting, waving an imperious hand at the wagon. "WHY is there a UNICORN TATTOO on our ASSES!"

Swift checked perception + investigation at difficulty 15, rolling 6 higher.

Rinel claps her hand over Monique's mouth. "You can't talk like that to the Archlector!" she squeaks in terror. "She'll turn us into goats!"

Monique checked dexterity + small wpn at difficulty 15, rolling 38 higher.

When Brigida announces that it's not her goat, Ansel offers a little blink and a cough and then a murmured, "Oh. Well. Then excuse our interruption." A step back and he's turning to look to Monique, "Get your goat back, Monique." He's then moving away, off in the direction that Sebastian went, to try and help gather up bags and the like, if there's too much for the Prince to handle.

"And a very nice goat it is," Mirk says with a nod of his head to Brigida. In a conspiratorial tone, he says, "Truth be told, I'm only here to leave offerings at Cybele and Bashira's tree. I'm not with them." He indicates the others, namely Swift, Monique, and Rinel, seeming to pick them out as the troublemakers. "I've been trying to figure that one out myself," he mentions to Monique, when she asks what happened. He's just taking it all in, mostly, chipping in with commentary and struggling not to laugh at anyone's misfortune.

Rinel yelps in pain as Monique's teeth sink into her hand! "OW!" She yanks her hand back. Blood begins to drip down her fingers and plunk into the grass, where it quickly is absorbed by the thirsty earth. "Your teeth are /sharp/! Do you file them?" The ex-scholar moves to inspect the outraged noblewoman's mouth, tilting her head as though examining a horse for sale.

Brigida pushes herself to her feet using the famous and feared staff, giving Swift a cold stare, knowing full well that there isn't an Iron Guard alive that would dare try and arrest her. Monique's outburst gets a glare before her protege leaps into the fray to put her hand over the Minx's mouth. The Iron Thorn's knuckles tighten around her staff but no strikes come but... her eyes fall to the blood dropping onto the ground of the Grove.

Sebastian hasn't gotten far, truthfully. Out of sight, and on the uneven path, he's stumbled, making a sound of delight when he's found a bag full of all his gear. He's just confirmed everything of his is in it, straightening, when he freezes. He hears the sounds of Ansel coming up behind him, but doesn't dare turn to look. "Ssss...stop," he hisses a warning, staring somewhere off into the woods.

Ansel checked composure at difficulty 25, rolling 14 lower.

"Do I..." Monique sputters at Rinel, jerking her flame bright head away from the Tern woman, exasperation warring with the struggle for regained composure. "Gods, put me in front of the damned Sleeping God and I'll face him rather than her drunk!" She glances sidelong to Mirk. "It's not funny," the Minx sulks, even though he's not outright laughing.

Rinel checked perception at difficulty 20, rolling 3 higher.

Monique checked perception at difficulty 20, rolling 3 lower.

Ansel is moving up near to Sebastian, only to then be told to stop and he does so, eyes shifting about to scan the immediate vacinity. Of course, he doesn't need to scan for long, for his gaze settles upon something and he's blinking once, then twice and then narrowing his eyes at the sight of the horn, "YOU! YOU STABBED ME!" Pause. Pause. "Waaaaaitttt .. what were we doing to a .. unicorn, Sebastian, that let you get a tuft of his hair and me to get stabbed?"

Brigida checked perception at difficulty 20, rolling 5 lower.

Mirk checked perception at difficulty 20, rolling 8 lower.

After a bit of poking around at the wagon, Swift pauses, crouching down to look over all the 'evidence'. Her eyes widening as more and more pieces come together and she follows the blatant path of damage along its natural arc. "Oh Gods... no. Nooooooooooooonononononono... that's.. that's bad." She pushes back up to her feet and looks around, perhaps looking for one of the others. Too late. "Shit. YOU MIGHT WANT TO RUN!"

Swift checked perception at difficulty 20, rolling 8 higher.

Sebastian's trying not to move -- to breathe, even. Except that doesn't do so well with Ansel's accusations of the unicorn, not to mention him. "Ssssss," he hisses, as if to try and keep the Duke quiet, before he blinks and squints at the unicorn. "Um. Here. Good... boy? Girl?" he digs into his pocket and offers the tuft of the unicorn's hair, like it's super-pissed about missing the hair and not everything else that probably happened as a result of Bas, someone, actually managing to grab that hair.

In the woods, these dusk time woods with the moon starting to totally rise, whatever Ansel and Sebastian are talking to seems to remember them and the pair have a choice to make. Stand their ground or be run down. Again. As it's charging.

Oh, it's no choice. Sebastian's running like the Abyss itself is after them.

"You're on your own," is what Ansel offers to Sebastian as the Duke catches sight of the Unicorn beginning to charge and he's not at all afraid of turning tail and beginning to run. Really fast. In the opposite direction.

Rinel bows with a Whisper-trained flourish. "For your tender affections, Lady Greenmarch, I would give up drink for a thousand cycles of my soul upon the Wheel!" she proclaims theatrically. And then she sees the unicorn. "Oh no." She grabs at Monique's hand. "Run, run, run, run!"

Mirk checked charm + animal ken at difficulty 15, rolling 34 higher.

Mirk whips his head around at the shout, following Swift's gaze, though it's clear he doesn't see anything at first. "Spirits," he mutters under his breath. He does, however, have a horse that may not technically be his. He doesn't go to the extreme of mounting the horse yet, but he's clearly thinking about it, and the amusement is gone. "What did you all do?" He shakes his head, and then steps forwards, releases the reins of the unfortunate horse (which might run off because of all the chaos). He says a few words in a strange language, their tone soothing, as if he's trying to placate something. He's making slow gestures, using his body language to reinforce the message, so that even if the words are lost, it might come across.

Monique stares at Swift and Rinel uncomprehendingly, even as the latter woman is trying to tug her away. But the Minx stands her ground, a stubborn Greenmarch at the end of her rapidly fraying rope. Thank the Gods for Mirk, because once confronted with the sight of a unicorn, Monique is lost anyway. Her eyes widen. Her breath catches.

Brigida clicks her tongue and Oswald shuffles to her side as she watches the panic as the unicorn emerges. Quietly to herself... quite serenely in all the chaos... she whispers a prayer to Petrichor.

Rinel pulls at Monique desperately--but then Mirk is speaking, and she's murmuring the same strange words he is, watching him with an intensity that is, well... quite frankly diminished substantially by her current state of inebriation.

Panting heavily, Sebastian puts a tree -- and a good swathe of distance -- between himself and the unicorn. For a moment, all he can do is lean against the tree, and listen for the sound of approaching, angry hoofbeats -- but it doesn't come. He finally dares to peek around the tree and sees -- Mirk, somehow soothing the beast that definitely wanted to open him and/or Ansel up with that horn but a few moments ago. He stares, open-mouthed.

Swift edges around the wagon, trying to move back towards Monique and Rinel without garnering the attention of the utterly magnificent creature Mirk is currently soothing. She skirts up to them and whispers, "We need to apologize. Alot. ALOT alot. I.. don't know the whole thing, but I know enough to know we need to apologize."

With the Unicorn no longer a charging threat, Ansel slows down, though only after ensuring that he puts a little distance between himself and the creature. His gaze plays over in the direction of Swift, brow lifting a touch as he gives a little cant of his head to the side, "Uh. What do you mean, Swift? Did you find something?"

Such a sight this would be to anyone who is there. To witness. Like BRigida. Duke and Prince are hightailing it. The two commoners as well, moving as swift as Swift and Rinel can bolt. Monique greenmarch stands her ground.

Ahh but Mirk. Gods - and spirits - bless Mirk. The man tries. But whatever he utters for one moment gets the focus on him. For a brief moment. Down goes the head and the side of it's head rams into the man, horn piercing skin and body checking the man across a good chunk of the grove. The wound looking much like what Ansel had. And it carries on. Headed for Monique where it body checks her, no broken skin and sends her down to the ground at the feet of the baby goat that's bleating again.

And keeps heading for Ansel and Sebastian.

Rinel checked willpower + medicine at difficulty 40, rolling 0 higher.

Mirk checked luck at difficulty 7, rolling 0 higher.

Monique checked luck at difficulty 7, rolling 7 higher.

7 inflicted and Mirk is harmed for minor damage.

Sebastian glances upwards. It's been a long time since he's climbed a tree, and he's severely hung over, but he's finding that /up a tree/ is sounds like a gloriously appealing place to hang out right now.

Rinel turns and sees the unicorn gore Mirk--and some of the glassiness of her stare drains away in horror. "Lord Halfshav!" she cries out, turning and breaking into a stumbling, limping run towards the man. She digs desperately in her newly found bag and finds some bandages as she collapses to her knees next to the fallen lord. "It's going to be okay," she says, reassuringly.

Sebastian checked dexterity + athletics at difficulty 15, rolling 9 higher.

Monique's mouth drops open at Mirk's words. Whatever he said, it's clear the Minx understood and might have been about to protest. But then there's a unicorn bodychecking her to the ground. Agile though she is, the Minx can't dodge today, hangovers being what they are. Instead, she finds her other ass check bruised and painful now, and the baby goat bleating in her ear to add insult to injury. And as the unicorn turns to round on her friends, she shouts something in that same language that Mirk spoke earlier.

Having turned just in time to see the unicorn charging, Ansel blinks as he watches Mirk get thrown and Monique tossed to the ground. He's then watching as Sebastian scurries up a tree and then he's glancing around, all pretense of conversation gone out the window as he attempts to simply get out of the way of the creature by bolting off to the side.

Mirk blinks in surprise, but from the looks of him, he realizes his mistake around the time he hits the ground, the wind knocked out of him. He huffs at that, one hand going to his ribs. It comes away a little bloodied, but not too badly. "Then it could have been much worse," he says, grimacing, and starts to sit up. He doesn't go anywhere, though, seemingly content to let Rinel do her work with her medical kit. "Spirits. I thought that might work. Good thing I learned that now..."

There's a moment where it seems like Mirk might have accomplished the task and the unicorn will calm. But then he's stabbed and Monique is sent to the ground and Ansel is once more being chased by a an angered unicorn. She darts glances all around before hurrying her way towards Brigida. Pausing a healthy distance away she doesn't try to put on airs or a play, she just offers, "Please. We did something really really stupid while really REALLY drunk. We will do whatever penance we need to, make whatever amends, but please. Help us. Please."

Swift ^

Rinel murmurs something to Mirk as she works with her medical kit. For once, her blinding drunken idiocy appears to be taking a back seat to actual competence. The wound is promptly cleaned with gauze, and she begins to sew it shut. She winces a few times as she pricks her own fingers with the suturing needle--she is, after all, still quite inebriated--but the end result is more than satisfactory for any Physician.

Swift checked charm + diplomacy at difficulty 20, rolling 4 higher.

Mirk checked charm + diplomacy at difficulty 20, rolling 71 higher. Mirk rolled a critical!

Monique checked wits + diplomacy at difficulty 31, rolling 12 lower.

Rinel checked charm + diplomacy at difficulty 20, rolling 9 lower.

From the -- relative -- safety of his new high perch, Sebastian's leans out past where his arms are wrapped around the trunk. "On your left!" he yells down, helpfully, to Ansel.

Brigida checked command + intimidation at difficulty 20, rolling 31 higher.

Brigida gives Swift a sideways glance. In truth the Archlector was enjoying watching the panic of the foolish people fleeing the unicorn... but then her favourite heathen Mirk is knocked down and so is the Minx. She closes her eyes, sighs and puts two fingers in her mouth. A shrill whistle cuts through the Grove and she stares at the unicorn, setting her jaw in the process. "That. Is. Enough!"

Maybe it's Monique's words. Maybe it's that Ansel's running around and making a harder target. Maybe it's the bleating of the baby goat? Maybe it's Brigida's whistle. Yes, that's likely it because the unicorn -stops- and turns to faces Brigida. Stands still, and the damage to the poor thing can be seen. The smudges of dirt, that strip of aeterna around it's horn, the missing bit of mane. It doesn't sit but if it was a dog, it would have done just that. And then it ambles over to Brigida, gentle as can be. As if to say 'but look what they did to me.'. And just like that, the Unicorn has stopped trying to gore the Duke of Temlmar.

It's probably a good thing that the unicorn has been calmed. It's hard to say how much more running Ansel could have done. Beadlets of alcohol-infused sweat have broken out on his brow and he's just beginning to pant a little bit for air. Slowing and then stopping, there's a pained little grunt that falls past his lips as he bends, hands coming to settle on his knees as he takes a moment to just ... breathe.

Mirk remains on the ground for a few moments, letting Rinel suture him. He's gritting his teeth. Clearly he's had better days, but just as clearly he's had worse, and he tolerates it. Once she's finished, he says, "My thanks, Rinel. You have done me a favor, and I'll remember it." He draws his cloak around him, concealing the wound, as if embarassed of it. The fireweave is, of course, untouched by his recent experiences. "But for now..." He rises to his feet. Then, though it's likely not necessary anymore, he says a few quiet words to the unicorn, offering it the services of the finest equerry in Arvum with the utmost sincerity, and promising to bring them to the unicorn pasture in just a little time. This time, however, it's in Arvani.

Despite the fact that the immediate crisis appears to have been averted... Sebastian is staying up in the tree for now. Maybe just to be safe. Or maybe because he's not quite sure how to get down, now.

Monique looks at the baby goat, and sighs a long and defeated sigh. "Etienne will love you." Her eyes trail back to the Archlector and the unicorn, and she pulls her bruised body upright once more, eyes searching for her friends.

Brigida gently, oh so gently, reaches up to take the aeterna from the unicorn's horn, her every action heavy with reverence (despite her earlier whistle and words). "Oh my Gods... Look at you..." she murmurs, ignoring everyone else as she softly strokes unicorn. Tear freely fall down the Archlector's cheeks as she does so.

Rinel murmurs quietly to Mirk before limping near to Brigida. "I'm sorry, Blessed," she says, sorrowfully. "I... I think that was my idea. I--I thought I could study the hair."

Monique is overheard praising Brigida: Tamer of Unicorns, Soother of Beasts, Wielder of Whackings

Monique is overheard praising Mirk: You tried.

Swift is... afraid to move. Very possibly to breath. Three people have felt its wrath so far and now its RIGHT THERE. She holds herself very, very still and hopes to all the Gods that its willing to accept whatever amends they can offer.

Straightening, Ansel is wincing once again, hand immediately shooting to his side. There's a little wet spot that darkens the crimson color of the shirt, but his hand is quickly covering it. Moving a touch more gingerly now, his gaze plays over towards Mirk, an incline of his head given. But it's Brigida's reaction to the unicorn that has the Duke wincing further. He looks to Rinel and there's a shake of his head, only for him to then look back to Brigida, "Archlector. We owe an apology that we can't even begin to give."

The unicorn, once the aeterna is off it's horn, seems mollified by the tender minstrations of the Archlector and what Mirk said, gives a scathing look to all and heads off into the underbrush. Leaving everyone there alone.

"Thank you, Archlector," Sebastian adds, his voice muffled by his elevation in the tree. "And Lord Mirk -- are you okay?" he calls down. It's probably absurd he's still in the tree with the unicorn having wandered off, but for a moment his life flashed before his eyes.

Brigida looks at the aeterna in her hand before angrily wiping the tears away. A long pause. A long... dangerous pause.

"Everyone. Leave this place. Now." Her voice is like a thorn of freezing ice.

Brigida checked command + intimidation at difficulty 15, rolling 49 higher.

Letting out a slow breath as the unicorn heads off into the woods, Swift looks back to Brigida nad bobs a quick curtsy, "Absolutely. Thank you so very much." Turning, she will quickly collect up anyone else still lingering and start hurrying them towards the exit. Except Mirk. Who did nothing wrong.

Mirk bows his head for a second at what Rinel has to say, not spoiling that moment with denials. Then he watches the unicorn go in silence, thoughtful. Only once it's disappeared into the underbrush does he look to Sebastian and shrug one shoulder. The shoulder opposite his injured side, specifically. He looks as if he might say something, but he side eyes Brigida and starts to comply. He makes his way past a particular tree, depositing a pouch full of seeds and soil at its base as he goes.

Rinel is starting, horribly, to sober. Which means she is beginning to understand /precisely/ how in trouble she is. She bows deeply to the Archlector. "Blessed," she murmurs, before limping away. Quickly.

Sir Floppington, the soulful hound arrives, following Rowenova.

Sebastian checked dexterity + athletics at difficulty 15, rolling 8 higher.

There's an incline of Ansel's head towards Brigida and then he's looking amongst the others, only to give a nod of his head towards Swift, moving to follow after her.

Monique takes the goat and heads to the tree Sebastian is stuck in, to help him down. For once, the Minx looks properly chastened and beyond that, she'll help him carry their stuff away.

That sounds like a fine idea. Only... how does one get down from a tree? Sebastian looks distinctly unsure, eyeing the ground. Eventually, he manages to drop down, but not without effort, shoulders and knees scraping the bark as he climbs down with Monique's help, looking exhausted. "I want to go to bed," he mutters at her, and for once it sounds like anything but a proposition.