Who We Are: A Reflection
Date
March 18, 2022, 6 p.m.
Hosted By
Participants
Pasquale Raven Raja Sunaia(RIP) Kiera
Organizations
Location
Arx - Ward of the Compact - Shrine of the Lost
Largesse Level
Refined
Comments and Log
1 Iron Guardsmen, 3 Black Fleet Reavers, Moonsilver, the pale-feathered raven arrive, following Raven.
Pasquale claimed one of the cushions minutes before the event and settled to wait for people to filter in and Giada's sermon to start. At this precise moment he's coughing softly into a silvery silk handkerchief. His attention more on that small suffering than the people around him.
Raven slips in and loiters towards the back for now.
A small group of Cullers arrive, chatting quietly amongst themselves. The group pause as they find people assembling. Raja nudges one of the men near her and points to a comfortable grouping of cushions for them all the sit. The group quietly moves to the cushions, stretching out like a pack of languid cats.
The clear night was a vault for the stars and that ever-present moon. Not to be overdressed, she has a cloak draped over her shoulders to avoid an actual jacket. Spotting Pasquale taking a cushion, she spots a simple chair and drifts over to collect it easily in a hand and deposit it next to him. "I haven't missed anything?" Sunaia whispers to her husband as she deposits herself in a chair.
Before the shrine's altar, there is a single cushion set apart from the others. On it kneels Giada, who wears her liturgical aeterna for once; she sits on the curve of her feet, hands resting in a casual fold on her lap. Her eyes are closed for a while until people begin to arrive, and only then does she look up with a warm smile on her face.
"Welcome, welcome. Everyone please find a place that is comfortable for you rest for a period of time."
Raja ignores the other Cullers and whatever they are whispering about. Instead, her attention is turned forward to look to Giada when she speaks. She turns her gaze over the others present. Spying Raven lurking in the back, she lifts a hand. "Hey. Come sit with me!" She calls to the woman. "You make better company than these guys." A thumb is jerked towards the thugs that had followed her into the shrine. The three thugs pause in their conversation just long enough to gesture rudely towards Raja. She cannot help but to laugh at them.
Raven snorts and moves to flop into a cushion, "Yeah, sure, fine. Why are he even here?"
Pasquale lifts his head after Sunaia asks if things have started and indicates no with a mute shake of his head. "You know Raven and Raja I think Sunaia?"
Sunaia manages to sit properly, with her black ankle boots crossed. Outside of Raven, who doesn't take a seat, this pale lady as the posture of someone slightly uncomfortable with relaxing. Watching Raja momentarily with a smirk, the slow delay to nod at Pasquale finally happens. "Raven, yes, Raja, I can't say."
"Feel free to join us." The words float across the room towards the Culler thugs. The Dark Reflection's Archlector is smiling right. at. them. At least it looks genuine. She listens as introductions are made, her smile turning into a grin. "Excellent. I thought I was going to have to explain that this is interactive. You should feel free to express a thought or question as it arises in your mind. Tonight, I will be teaching the practice of Reflection. In this form, we'll focus on the Dream; obviously, mirrors are not necessary to Reflect." She motions around to their conspicuous absence.
"Let us quickly discuss tonight's meditations. In it, I encourage you to listen to what is said and question it for yourself. Wonder about it, weigh it, turn it over and examine all of its sides. There is no true wisdom to be found in mindless consumption, and you will find Reflection only in the challenge of preconceptions and thoughts. Allow your mind to engage presently; be unflinching in your evaluation."
Winter, A Highhill Puppy, Angeline arrive, following Kiera.
Raja looks to Raven, leaning closer. "That is the big question. Why are any of us here? All part of a dream.." She moves her hand in an arching manner. "Good to see you, Raven." A smile is offered to her. Then her ebon gaze shifts to look towards Pasquale and Sunaia. Lifting her hand, she gives a polite gesture of greeting to the two.
Raven bows her head respectfully, "A pleasure to see you again, my lady." towards Sunaia. She pats a cushion next to her when Kiera arrives and then turns her attention to Giada and falls silent.
Pasquale responds to Giada's introduction with nothing but a serious nod. Raja and Raven on the other hand gain a slight smile.
Giada says, "We will begin the meditation."
Kiera nods her thanks to raven and sits upon the cushion with a nod and a quetly whispered "Thank you before turning her attention to giada
2 Culler Brutes have been dismissed.
1 Culler Boatswain have been dismissed.
Giada's hands unfold and gently press palms down into her thighs. "Begin by finding a position of your body that is relaxed and sensible. There's no need to sit in any particular way, nothing fancy required. The most sensible way to approach Reflection is from a place where are certain in your body. Trying to meditate with a pebble under your knee is impractical if avoidable, let's face it." Her gaze moves to each face, flashing Kiera a quick welcoming smile as she goes.
"Who are you?"
"As you Reflect, focus your mind on that question. Who am I? What is my Self?"
Raven closes her eyes and draws in a breath. There's a slight press of her lips for some reason but she goes silent and still as she Reflects on these things.
Kiera sits with her legs crossed and her arms folded in her lap, closes her eyes, concentration event on her face.
Pasquale shifts on the cushion until his legs are properly folded and he can rest his hands lightly atop his knees. He glances to Kiera as well before turning his face back towards Giada's position and letting his eyes sink closed. His mind turns to that question. One he's asked himself many many times.
Looking around again, Sunaia sees even Raven is relaxing to organise her thoughts. Giada can see it on her face as the pale woman, draws her legs up to cross in the simple chair. Easily able to adjust, she leans back into the chair's back as if she might be getting comfortable. Her eyes close, almost still reluctant and she forces a breath out of her chest.
"A 'self' is not the same thing as a particular living entity." The Godsworn proceeds to guide the thoughts of those gathered through the process of Reflection. "It is abstract, which is to say that it has the same qualities as an hour, an inch, or a pound. Identity is a construct birthed for a purpose." She speaks calmly, but there's no sense of formality to how she speaks. Her tone is casual, her volume pitched as if in normal conversation. The words come as fluidly as thoughts. "We use our Identity to communicate a concept to another person. Society teaches us that we have a Self, but we often give it the unearned concreteness of our arm or our nose."
Raven remains silent and mostly still though there are restless fidgets here and there.
Contrary to many of the others here Pasquale barely moves at all. His attention seemingly turned inwards.
Sunaia continues to breathe with disciplined purpose. Maybe she has learned to do something similar before. One can't be certain, her shoulders are still tense as she considers what is being suggested. The projection of herself now is telling enough, and bound to have some frayed miscommunication tied thereof. Perhaps that is what made her scan the room before closing her eyes, and still being unable to relax muscles she's fit enough to control. Now, her posture may try to project a more gathered and centered image of herself. Listening to a room of breathing and slight ripples of movement were fairly comforting if only she stilled enough.
Kiera nods, a scholar's unconcious act of silent affirmation
A plume of incense is carried by a daught of spring wind, some of it right into Giada's face. She waves her hand to clear the smoke, continuing as if nothing happened the whole time. "Of our Self, what we see is little more than a sketch made up of the things people tell us we are, be it in direct or indirect ways. We play about with their picture of us, and they reflect something to us again, such that we craft this concept of Self between ourselves and society." Moonlight mixes with the glow of quietly crackling braziers, silver and gold chasing shadows on the shrine floor.
Kiera purses her lips in greater concentration
The question is much more difficult for Raja than a lot of people. It is a question that she has been working on answering for some time. As she sits upon her cushion, she takes in a breath to clear her usually chaotic mind, silently reflecting on the question at hand. "I find.." Raja says quietly, speaking up in this interactive exercise, ".. I find that there are two selves. The self we want people to see and the self we truly are."
Raven says, "What about the selves we think we are and the selves we actually are? Deception starts with ourselves for some."
Pasquale agrees with Raja's words enough that he opens his eyes and looks across that way. He doesn't speak though, not even when Raven does, his expression deeply introspective.
Sunaia looses an eye to look at Pasquale to the side of her on a cushion. Raja speaking makes her turn to the sound, and open both eyes. Her serious expression is not lost, however. The points made let her return to closing her eyes, and think about herself.
Kiera voices her agreement this time "Youu are not alone in this pridicament Mr. Raja. I find an all too frequent conflict results. As a consequence I feel I am deceiving others despite my search for truth"
"I'm going to challenge you to go even further down that road," Giada returns to Raja and Raven. "What is that 'real' Self but a composition of reactions to what we encounter? When we are asked who we are, we tend towards the recitation of a history. 'I am so and so. I was given this name by my parents, I come from this place, I've accomplished these things within my life,' and we compose a neatly bound biography." Her gaze turns to Kiera, then Pasquale and Sunaia. "The Dream says forget it." Lips quirk in a half smile under sparkling eyes.
"That's not you. That's some story, that's all past. Who is the -real- you? The 'you' that you are now? But nobody knows who that is, for we do not know ourselves except through listening to our echoes and consulting our memories. So this leads us back to the question -- Who am I?"
Raven says, "A soul, a collection of memories which shape our perspectives and values, and a messy heap of emotions."
Raja sighs. "I think there is a self I want to be and the self I really am, the self I fight against." Her eyes furrow and look down to her hands. "If we fight against what our truest passions and desires are.. Is the fight who we are or are the passions our true nature?"
Pasquale considers Giada's words for a moment and says "I don't think the story and the core self can be seperated Giada. Every part of the story is influenced by the I and every part of the I is influenced by the story."
Sunaia says to Pasquale, "I believe she means we are not confined by our story. Our decisions could lead us to leaving the elements of our origins. Maybe." She can't be entirely positive, but that was her thought.
"A soul experiences many Selfs as the Queen returns them to the Wheel time and again," Giada points out to Raven and Pasquale, "whereas an entire identity can be erased by a blow to the head long before Death comes. The soul extends far beyond identity. Again, this is how we confuse the Self for something it is not. We can see this begin when we were babies. We hadn't been told anything and didn't know anything other than that which we felt and could not name."
Kiera nods to pasquale "A constant flux if we allow ourselves to be changed by each experience, truly consider each bit of information. not quite the same self as i was yesterday
Raven lapses into silence and considers the differences between identity and the self.
Pasquale asks Giada. "Do our souls not influence who we become? Are we born as blank slates?"
Sunaia looks like she might have been seen in that last bit of imagery from Giada. She ran fingers through her hair at her left ear, and nearly mutters. "Not that I could name her, if I wanted."
Raja falls quiet once more, simply comtemplating the words said.
"Mmn," Giada says as she shifts to look at Pasquale. "I don't have a solid answer for that, but I suspect they do. It would be another one of the influences on this idea of 'Myself'. Who 'I' am. We can go back through our biography, linking threads and memories to reinforce our sense of individuality, but it remains a concept. We can measure the passage of a minute, but 'a minute' is just a word we give to communicate an idea. Were you born into another culture somewhere else with a different language, 'a minute' likely isn't heard there, and the society might even use a different measurement as the standard. We tend to equate Soul and Self, when they are not exactly the same thing. One is the creation of the Queen, while the other is our own. "
The woman shifts a bit, making a subtle adjustment as she continues, though this time redirecting the reflection from Death to Aion. "Within the Dream itself, we feel alive, feel our consciousness, but we cannot explain that consciousness because it exists in each and every kind of experience. It is the place in which we exist, like a fish in water. What does it know of water? What does a bird know of air? Consider what you know of the Dream around you."
Pasquale listens thoughtfully to everything that Giada says before glancing to Kiera. "Not every event has a big impact but, yes, thats what I believe." As Sunaia muses he lightly touches her leg.
Raven sighs and notes, "one is generally permanent and the other is just a chapter in a book. What's the point of distinction? Personal accountability?"
Raja turns her ebon gaze from person to person. She listens to what they have to say, making mental notes. The conversation seems to get too deep for the other Cullers. The thugs rise from their cushions and meander off. However, Raja remains. She is acutely interested.
Sunaia rests her hand on Pasquale's at her leg. The placement being the most relaxed reflex she's had thus far. She watched Raven a moment, thinking but having nothing she would add in the moment.
Kiera nods andcontinues to consider and listen
1 Knight of the Temple have been dismissed.
1 Templar Knight guards have been dismissed.
Luzio, the burly Mirrormask have been dismissed.
a tall and silent woman with only one hand have been dismissed.
Pasquale starts to quietly cough again. The first three coughs he ignores but once they keep on going he moves slowly to his feet and murmurs something about heading home to his wife before going that way.
Sunaia lets her feet slips back to the floor, standing to walk behind her husband at his normal pace.
2 Culler Brutes, 1 Culler Boatswain leave, following Raja.
Cinder, a tall and elegant sighthound with lustrous black fur arrives, following Mark.
2 Culler Brutes, 1 Culler Boatswain arrive, following Raja.
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