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Written By Strozza

Dec. 4, 2019, 9:54 a.m.(4/24/1012 AR)

Curious words reach me of a disturbing subject

I suppose that's to be expected. There has been little happening around the city. When better to try to stir up troubles.

Does not matter. This shall likely be the most attention it receives from me, unwarranted and unfounded words aren't worth further time.

Written By Strozza

Dec. 4, 2019, 9:05 a.m.(4/24/1012 AR)

Weasel judges wrong
Sniffs out within its own den
Be wary less struck

Written By Ras

Dec. 4, 2019, 8:12 a.m.(4/24/1012 AR)

Relationship Note on Elisha

I'm sorry to my sister cuz I didn't keep my word, but I couldn't go anywhere without your shadow at the corners of my eyes, and I was drunk. No excuse, just the truth. Another broken promise. Can't count how many times I've let stormbird down. And you, told you I'd find you. I tried not to cuz Maja said she needed me, but in the end just couldn't hold still.

It's cuz I went by the Steep and stopped to look inside the window to see if you were there. But you weren't. And I remembered that you'd never be there again.

At the gate, there was a caravan goin north, and after I got with em, wasn't easy to stop. Outside of Arx, your shadow wasn't there. All I could think of was you somewhere lost and alone, even though at night, Maja's cryin face wouldn't let me sleep. So much worse than Jeffy's sad looks.

In the end, it wasn't my choice to come home. But I guess there wasn't any other choice to make. I couldn't find you.

Couldn't be there for you even though you were always there for me. When I was mean to you. When I told you shit that nobody else would just believe. When I made mistakes, bad mistakes. When I was hidin from the guards, or when I was in jail, or doin penance, or when anythin bad and boring happened, or whenever I was happy bout anythin good, you were there for me.

You listened to my stupid stories, you read me your poems and asked questions about what words were better - who else would ask me about words? You gave me ideas about things that were botherin me or things that I thought were okay and weren't. You told me secrets, but none of the really scary ones, and no matter what you knew you were always sweet. You were there when Nyce's million silver was on the floor, and you talked about the ladder instead. You made me laugh harder than anybody else could, and shared your gross lumps of hand-grease bread, and left things at my place that reminded you of me, and if I hadn't tidied, you'd have made as much of a mess there as you made of your own apartment. Now I wouldn't mind the mess.

You'd tell me about shit that worried you or shit that hurt your feelings, even though your feelings didn't get hurt a lot, cuz you were always floating. You floated better than anyone in the world. You were the only person I could listen to bout floating without gettin pissed off, and you told me that you were pissed off too, and you just dealt different from me or most folk. I'd never seen you as angry at all, and when you shared that, it felt like somethin special, like I understood a secret part of you. I'm bad at floating, but you sat with me until I slept when I was sad, you never tried to talk about things when I didn't want to, you never blamed me for ruining your life, and you always tried to help - with my cases, girl problems, with anythin. You always had the best ideas about what to do. If it wasn't for you I wouldn't've been brave enough to tell her how I felt, and cuz of you I lived the happiest weeks of my life.

You'd shove me if I needed a shove, or hug if I needed a hug, or tell me to get outta there if I wanted to go. You'd call me all those silly names, like twice-baked goose egg, or Alaras, or rattle-pated squirrel-sniffer, or cloudtouched, or Rassie, or whatever. I'm not the only one who's gonna miss your name-callin. Syd doesn't know who'll understand why she's the Waterfall now. You could pretend anythin. Nobody else woulda said a booger was my kingly retainer. Nobody else coulda come up with Allicot Percival Thoroughgood.

And you weren't just funny or clever. You'd stand in front of someone who was askin after my embarrassing secrets, and not tell her, even though you knew. Even though you suck at keepin secrets and barely ever remember which is whose. I never told you what that meant to me, that you didn't tell, but I trusted you. I could trust you to be you and to be my friend no matter what. You never asked me to change, or scolded me for gettin into shit. And in the end, you knew all my secrets, except for what happened right before they took you away. I never got the chance to tell you that one, but I know you wouldn't've hated me even for somethin so bad. You never hated anyone, and you told me everyone was the same. That was crazy but it made me think.

You'd say a lot of crazy things, but I started to understand how you thought, and to sorta know what crazy thing you'd be about to say some of the times - like that shit you said about Orathy - even if I didn't always agree, or even get it totally. Your mind just worked different and I guess you couldn't stop in the end. You just weren't made to be a costermonger, or a matchmaker, or anybody except you. Stormbird understood that you had to be true to your soul. I don't blame you for anythin. After all, you never even locked your door.

I'll never know somebody else like you...

I can't go to the bath house without seein you sittin in the cold tub singin in the middle of winter. You were a shitty singer but I liked to hear anyway. I can't stay home without seein you on the couch. Always takin off your boots. At the park, I keep expectin you on a picnic table writin poems and stories. Can't go to the graveyard without thinkin of you picking flowers there. When I look at a window at night and see reflections, I remember what we talked about that last time we talked alone at the bakery, hours before sunrise, and it's almost like I can see your reflection beside mine for a second. Are you on the other side of the dark glass? Hazers at the Hollow say they miss you. But they can't miss you as much as I do.

Rinel warned me about sayin goodbye. You'll never have that tea party you were plannin for her now, and the last time I saw you I didn't say goodbye at all. We were celebratin that you'd made it to the sixteenth, and I thought everythin was gonna be okay. You were laughin, and makin friends with other people's dogs, and callin me an inventor and callin Syd 'Lady Sydonia Floribund'. I wanted to move my chair closer to yours, cuz you were like the sun and I was cold.

Now I'm always cold. Stormbird says the sun's gone to shine on other lands, just like you told me about the twigs in the river. Always floating, always there, even if I couldn't see you, and it's true. There's hardly anywhere in the Lowers where I don't think of you. Your shadow's always here. I can stand on the roof waitin for years and feelin like you'll be there any minute, but.

You're actually gone. I can't really see you. Rat kebabs don't taste the same. Bread's like dry mud in my mouth. I haven't tried soup'n'biscuits again yet but I bet it's shit too. Nothin will ever be the same.

Nobody'll understand how you changed my life completely. I became a better person cuz of you, somebody who cared about how other people felt and saw the value of love instead of just speed. You made me start thinkin I could be good, instead of just bad all the time. And cuz of you, I won't stop tryin.

I want you to know that there's a lot of folk who care about you. Who told me to take you to the spiritwalkers, or to Estroch, and how to fix us disguises so we could come home again. Who tried to give me gems to trade with Abandoned, or coin for the road, and didn't get pissed that I wanted to find you. Who told me to tell you that they loved you, and that we'd have gone with blessings and prayers.

But I let everyone down, in every way, every time. You were the only one who never minded that. I'll miss you forever, Eli.

...

And I don't care who else reads this. For once in my life I'll be as brave as the poet, with his soul held out in open hands, who didn't write to the blacks.

...

Flax-embossed turdlings.

Written By Ember

Dec. 4, 2019, 7:19 a.m.(4/24/1012 AR)

The past few weeks have been a balm to my state of mind. Time spent tending to the matters of Redreef Shores while standing on those same shores was a welcome change, especially in that it spared me some of winter's icy wrath. The finishing touch of a celebration honoring the birthday of myself and my sister was enough to make me wish I could have stayed longer. I am back in Arx now, and once I finish putting pen to paper on this journal entry, I shall begin reviewing what I've missed, which surely couldn't have been very much...

Written By Arianna

Dec. 3, 2019, 10:04 p.m.(4/23/1012 AR)

Relationship Note on Elisha

I have so many things occupying my time right now but I still find time to peruse the white journals of interest. There's some commentary to be made on a few things but honestly I mostly just want to know one thing and one thing only.

What the fuck was Elisha smoking?

Written By Sabella

Dec. 3, 2019, 9:52 p.m.(4/23/1012 AR)

The Grayson Basket Raffle could not have been more successful and I really need to thank all of those who donated baskets and goods:

Prince Niklas Grayson
Princess Elgana Redrain
Countess Carita Darkwater
Lord Jyri Whitehawk
Lady Zoey Kennex
Lady Kaia Bisland
Lady Monique Greenmarch
Brother Felix Meadson
Guildmaster Josephine Acuri
Mistress Ephrath Drake
Master Alexio Donatti

This fundraiser also would not have been successful without all the amazing people who bought raffle tickets! All in all we were able to raise just shy of 2 million silver, which will be used by the Knights of Solace on such projects as the Tragedy Orphanage and maintaining the safety of travelers on the Great Road.

I remain deeply touched by the generosity of Arx's citizens. Those of us who can afford it should turn our attention to the less fortunate as often as we can. It is our duty and I am so happy to see how many people jumped at the chance to better the lives of those who need help.

Thank you all so very much!

Written By Sparte

Dec. 3, 2019, 3:40 p.m.(4/22/1012 AR)

Ael'Noctis. I have not been blessed with the mind to understand much of languages beyond my native Arvani, but the name seems such a critical one and the question so simple. How does it translate into our tongue?

Written By Sparte

Dec. 3, 2019, 2:30 p.m.(4/22/1012 AR)

I have sat much of late in thought of White, Black, and the shades of Gray between them. Of those who attempt to balance White and Black upon a canvas such that the canvas never knows Gray. Artists both recent, and those I have learned of studying history. Some unaware of their own Art.

The implications are many, and I fear that what I have concluded would be hard even for The Salon to accept, yet I can say one detail with clarity and conviction. There is White, and there is Black, but they are aspirational for the likes of us. They are destinations we are not meant to reach, and either can be blinding.


Written By Anisha

Dec. 3, 2019, 1:35 p.m.(4/22/1012 AR)

I've been aiding a client by sorting through their things. It's a thrill, really - to hear their stories and the memories attached to certain outfits, certain perfumes, a particular piece of jewelry.

But, they did admit their home were a smidge cluttered, and so we worked to rid them of things that no longer brought fondness with the memories, things that didn't spark memories at all, or just... Had served their time.

There's a method to it. I'm reminded of certain writings on the potential of all things, and how those can wax poetic. I should wax similarly poetic about how our belongings can gain some weight of who we are. A reassurance.

If I am to turn this into more than just a one-off (and I should want to), I want it to be constructive. A constructive examination of material belongings. A riddance of things that no longer speaks to a person.

Constructive Material Riddance.

ConMaRi.

Yes, I think I have it.

Written By Lenne

Dec. 3, 2019, 11:49 a.m.(4/22/1012 AR)

Relationship Note on Mirk

There is a certain serenity, to choices made.

I've been so frazzled, since I arrived. So undirected. That isn't the Lenne I know.
Lenne is a creature of goals. And I finally feel minimally educated enough to set myself to some, in confidence, at last.

It's a crushing weight, that I was only peripherally aware of, suddenly lifted. Today I wake and find I breathe easier.

Thank Vellichor for Elder Mirk Halfshav, for his wise guidance of a very lost girl. Thank the spirits that guard him.

Written By Arcadia

Dec. 3, 2019, 11:21 a.m.(4/22/1012 AR)

Relationship Note on Kaldur

A bet has been made and I am excited. I do however recognize my own worst fault is my competitiveness, and incessant need to prove myself better, even if it is to myself. But I plan on winning this one. I look forward to the daily challenge and the well earned result at the end. Be prepared.

Written By Sydney

Dec. 3, 2019, 11:12 a.m.(4/22/1012 AR)

The last few days are a haze. I slept little and ate less, drank myself into a stupor and was spat out the other side without an ounce of relief. What do we do when our tried and true vices fail to provide the comfort we need to continue crawling, to say nothing of walking?

Friendships splintered, plans scattered, I feel more adrift now than I can put to words.

Thank all of the gods for those willing to put up with the flailing mess that is a drunken brawler, to offer her kind words and an anchor to the world. Even those I meant to target with all of my bile and vitriol found ways to defuse and comfort me before I even had the chance to act in anger.

I wanted to scream, to be unsightly, to gain that catharsis and release that comes with letting all of this poison out of me, but was instead met with reason, with warmth, and with guidance.

I am grateful.

And resentful.

But so very, very thankful, even in my despair.

Written By Riagnon

Dec. 2, 2019, 7:52 p.m.(4/21/1012 AR)

Relationship Note on Mirk

I'm grateful for the Elder Shaman's wisdom. Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for the Vala's as well! It's just that... when you're someone else's best friend unofficially, it creates a reasonable amount of personal bias. For them.

Written By Rukhnis

Dec. 2, 2019, 6:01 p.m.(4/21/1012 AR)

I find little that is glad in the world of late, but the healthy birth of Lord Nakoa Crovane is one bright glimmer of light in the heavy dark. May this innocent soul grow up full of joy and song, be ever surrounded by those who understand him most deeply yet love him even when they do not, and never suffer as other innocents in this world do.

Written By Rukhnis

Dec. 2, 2019, 5:56 p.m.(4/21/1012 AR)

Relationship Note on Reigna

In my time since coming to Arx, I have encountered one person who is to me the exemplar of all the highest ideals of the medical profession. Her skill in mending others is a wonder to behold, her knowledge of the healing arts a marvel, her sense of duty transcends mere conscientiousness. When the terrible blight came into Arx on the slavers' ship and afflicted so many, she worked beyond the edge of exhaustion to treat all its victims, whether foreigner or friend. Indeed she has had faith in me where many others would surely have hesitated to trust one of my heritage, and it has been only through her trust and assistance that I have been able to serve the sick and the wounded of Arx to even so small a degree as I can claim. But however great my own gratitude, it can only pale beside that of the many scores of people whom she has helped, within the city and beyond.

In short, I cannot imagine anyone filling the role of an Assistant Crown Minister in the field of health with greater capability, compassion, or care than Marquessa Reigna Keaton.

Written By Strozza

Dec. 2, 2019, 5:15 p.m.(4/21/1012 AR)

If I am adaptable how does that not make me undefined?

One can have goals. One can have dreams.

One must put family first, self second. This is how a family thrives.

Written By Reigna

Dec. 2, 2019, 4:42 p.m.(4/21/1012 AR)

I am beyond honored at being asked to become the Assistant Minister of Civil Development in the Department of Health! I very much look forward to continuing my service to the citizens of Arx and beyond in this capacity.

I could never have achieved such without the faith and support of my husband, my fantastic assistant guildmasters, Rukhnis al Katibi and Lady Margret Greenmarch, my phenomenal patron, Her Highness Princess Elgana Redrain and my bestfriend, Lady Khanne Halfshav.

It is a humbling thing to see the faith placed in me and my work, and I promise to do my very best with these responsibilities.

May the light of the gods ever shine upon us, and may hope never stray far from our hearts.

Written By Rysen

Dec. 2, 2019, 4:32 p.m.(4/20/1012 AR)

Relationship Note on Reese

Reese's Song

From the House of Grayon,
There rides the perfect knight,
Her hair the purest gleam of gold,
From which ribbons take their flight.

When not on missions daring,
She trains with sword and lance;
She's once this poet truly blessed
With a graced, enchanting dance!

Nor less a poet is this knight
Whose epic not of ink,
But of mighty deeds was wrought,
Of which Seraphic choirs sing!

Yet stand beside this warrior,
This princess, glorious and bright,
Mercy sweet, and Kindness,
Who attend her with delight.

My muse, though bold and soaring,
Cannot yet find the means
To express the fiery ecstasy
When her lips did touch my cheek.

O dauntless scourge of evil!
O friend to holy peace!
To Lagoma rise my ardent songs
In thanks for Princess Reese!

Written By Anisha

Dec. 2, 2019, 3:12 p.m.(4/20/1012 AR)

Relationship Note on Vayne

I spoke with the Archlector today, and we discussed my duties as a Mirrormask. No details, of course. Both as a Whisper and as a Mirrormask, I hold the confidence of those who choose to speak to me in the highest respect.

But I think there is something to be said for service in the shrine itself. There's something about being alone with oneself and the many reflections of the black stone.

There are no plants to tend, for all that we'd will it. Sometimes I wonder if more curious plants would grow there, the ones we know require rarefied nourishment.

But that is for others. For me, well. I donned my mask and dark garb, and I advised as best I could.

It's different from being Anisha Whisper, when you are just one Reflection among many.

But I think I am better for it.

Written By Arcadia

Dec. 2, 2019, 2:31 p.m.(4/20/1012 AR)

Dear scholar.

I would like It noted that just because I have a stack of papers, I am not turning into a scholar. Alright. I did have an abacus, but I am still not a scholar. Look! fine yes. I was looking in books and had a pencil between my teeth and no, there was no crossbow held at my head. It still does not make me a scholar, does it?

Please note that the scholars may take some time preparing your journal for others to read.

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