Written By Alis
May 3, 2018, 10:52 a.m.(9/3/1008 AR)
It is a difficult thing, the loss of a friend or family member. And I thought to confine my thoughts to the Blacks this time, as they are so muddled and conflicted this time around. But there is no shame in the struggle of finding one's footing after a tragedy, and perhaps it is good for people to see we run the same depth and gamut of emotion no matter what else may be the same or different about our lives.
One more member of the family fallen. I think for a day or two I was simply numb to it. Beginning at Sanctum, out in the field of battle, and now in Arx itself I have heard of or watched parents, siblings by blood and siblings by marriage, aunts, uncles, cousins, servants, guards, soldiers, knights and commanders and innocents die. Sometimes in ignorance, as I slept safely buffered by members of the King's Own. And, sometimes because of my own commands. There is sorrow, anger, denial, despair, and guilt most times. But this, for a moment, there was just nothing. I could feel absolutely nothing.
And that scared me. Jacque was family, and I cared for him as I do any other relation. There is little I won't do for my family, intensely loyal and fiercely protective of them as I tend to be. But finally, as we make the first steps towards investigating how this was able to happen, and there is a moment to breathe, I have been able to let tears fall.
I did leave one thing out of my recitation of emotions though. And that is resolve. After all is said and done, there is resolve to keep moving ahead. To justice for the fallen, and to live, in order to keep the memories of our loved ones alive for awhile longer.
One more member of the family fallen. I think for a day or two I was simply numb to it. Beginning at Sanctum, out in the field of battle, and now in Arx itself I have heard of or watched parents, siblings by blood and siblings by marriage, aunts, uncles, cousins, servants, guards, soldiers, knights and commanders and innocents die. Sometimes in ignorance, as I slept safely buffered by members of the King's Own. And, sometimes because of my own commands. There is sorrow, anger, denial, despair, and guilt most times. But this, for a moment, there was just nothing. I could feel absolutely nothing.
And that scared me. Jacque was family, and I cared for him as I do any other relation. There is little I won't do for my family, intensely loyal and fiercely protective of them as I tend to be. But finally, as we make the first steps towards investigating how this was able to happen, and there is a moment to breathe, I have been able to let tears fall.
I did leave one thing out of my recitation of emotions though. And that is resolve. After all is said and done, there is resolve to keep moving ahead. To justice for the fallen, and to live, in order to keep the memories of our loved ones alive for awhile longer.
Written By Isabeau
May 3, 2018, 10:27 a.m.(9/3/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Dominique
While princesses may be adept at attending social functions, when it comes to planning and execution, I cannot recommend enough the services of the Whisper House and their highly-skilled courtesans. You will not regret it, cousin.
Written By Sabella
May 3, 2018, 10:14 a.m.(9/3/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Jonathan
Not that I have firsthand experience with it, of course, but I hear that the Guildmaster has a wonderful tea that will help you get through your morning!
Written By Lou
May 3, 2018, 10:09 a.m.(9/3/1008 AR)
Happily, Alarissa has agreed to start planning some social events for the Explorers. She has no idea how much of a relief this is to me -- though she'll assuredly discover it when she reads the whites.
Unhappily, Mason has become a bit insufferable of late. I'm starting to show outward signs of the pregnancy. You know, the signs where I start to slowly blow up like a whale? Yeah. Those signs. It's not that I'm not excited for this child. I am. It's a gift and I know it. It's that Mason won't let me do any damned thing myself. He has to do it all for me. So, I've been escaping to the Explorers Hall of late so I can actually manage to do a few things for myself.
Is it bad that I hope that it starts getting colder sooner? I know in the coming months that I'll want him to help a bit more with stuff. Just... not when I can manage it on my own.
But, in case he doesn't know, and he's reading this, I LOVE HIM TO PIECES. There's my PDA for the day.
(Please stop smothering me.)
Unhappily, Mason has become a bit insufferable of late. I'm starting to show outward signs of the pregnancy. You know, the signs where I start to slowly blow up like a whale? Yeah. Those signs. It's not that I'm not excited for this child. I am. It's a gift and I know it. It's that Mason won't let me do any damned thing myself. He has to do it all for me. So, I've been escaping to the Explorers Hall of late so I can actually manage to do a few things for myself.
Is it bad that I hope that it starts getting colder sooner? I know in the coming months that I'll want him to help a bit more with stuff. Just... not when I can manage it on my own.
But, in case he doesn't know, and he's reading this, I LOVE HIM TO PIECES. There's my PDA for the day.
(Please stop smothering me.)
Written By Jonathan
May 3, 2018, 10:02 a.m.(9/3/1008 AR)
A note, my dear scholars. The next time that you might feel the urge to start a drinking contest with an entire table of Crimson Blades, plus a King's Own?
Don't.
Don't.
Written By Kenna
May 3, 2018, 9:54 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Silas
If a little pudge about the hips is the price we pay to have Tabby carry the Whitehawk name...
Yeah, I am alright with that price.
(Just so long as she shares these cakes everywhere!)
Yeah, I am alright with that price.
(Just so long as she shares these cakes everywhere!)
Written By Quenia
May 3, 2018, 8:22 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
I find myself reclining into old habits, staying hidden away in the house to focus on paperwork rather than being social. I need to work on this more. I shall endeavor to go someplace social at least three times a week. Though, at least, tonight I can rejoice that I will be having a house full of people once more as I host yet another Igniseri family dinner.
Now to come up with a proper dinner menu. Suggestions, anyone?
Now to come up with a proper dinner menu. Suggestions, anyone?
Written By Silas
May 3, 2018, 6:44 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Tabitha
Every gained pound will be worth it!
Written By Tabitha
May 3, 2018, 5:25 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Silas
You're getting cakes and paintings too, obviously!
Written By Silas
May 3, 2018, 5:21 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Lys
I hate making my bed, personally, but at least it has silk sheets now. The sleeping part is the best part.
Written By Cambria
May 3, 2018, 2:54 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Hadrian
My husband and I have not shared the warmest of relationships. It is no secret that my marriage to him was forged as much through a clever, even under-handed, bit of positioning on my part as it was arguably through thinly veiled coercion. I married for political reasons, without regard for feelings, because I seem to be one of the remaining nobles in the capital that still adheres to the belief that love is the last consideration for marriage between Peers. It has been fortunate, then, that the former Duke of Southport possesses a similar mindset to mine own when it comes to the running of a House. Early on we established that, though he had little more than personal contempt for me and what I had done to him, he was part of House Mazetti. What's more, he was immediately named my Voice, and therefore afforded (saddled), with all the responsibilities that came with the role.
In that regard, he has never disappointed. Which, as I have said to my family many times, is precisely one of the reasons why I chose him for my husband. Few are the men or women who would not choose to punish the House. Few are the men or women who would have even set aside their personal hopes and dreams to secure the continued honor of the family and seat they were to lose - all because their forebear signed a contract years ago. Whatever may have passed between us up until now, it is my desire to put to ink that the once Duke Hadrian Malvici is a man of conviction, perseverance and principle.
He works tirelessly for other people, whether it is with the Arvum Refugee Relief Group, or on a more individual scale. His concern for his former vassals of House Saik is nothing other than touching. Even Donkey Knights, an entirely non-serious (except when it is), light-hearted affair is done in the spirit of providing levity to others. As I spend my evening recuperating, and thinking about the past few years, I realize that I cannot recall a time when he has done something for himself.
Our child was so important to him he even spent months acquiring medical knowledge and skills so that he could deliver the baby himself. While not something I wish to spend overlong on, I will impart this: I was not convinced at first. I was barely convinced in the end. As a vain woman, as a first time mother, the very idea was less than thrilling, for reasons that hardly need elaborating. Now that it is over, however, I am glad for it.
Whatever may have come before must be consigned to the past. The man I call husband has fathered a future Guardian. He is now one of us, through bonds of blood. And again I say, I made the right choice. I hope that, even if it is not now, Hadrian feels the same.
In that regard, he has never disappointed. Which, as I have said to my family many times, is precisely one of the reasons why I chose him for my husband. Few are the men or women who would not choose to punish the House. Few are the men or women who would have even set aside their personal hopes and dreams to secure the continued honor of the family and seat they were to lose - all because their forebear signed a contract years ago. Whatever may have passed between us up until now, it is my desire to put to ink that the once Duke Hadrian Malvici is a man of conviction, perseverance and principle.
He works tirelessly for other people, whether it is with the Arvum Refugee Relief Group, or on a more individual scale. His concern for his former vassals of House Saik is nothing other than touching. Even Donkey Knights, an entirely non-serious (except when it is), light-hearted affair is done in the spirit of providing levity to others. As I spend my evening recuperating, and thinking about the past few years, I realize that I cannot recall a time when he has done something for himself.
Our child was so important to him he even spent months acquiring medical knowledge and skills so that he could deliver the baby himself. While not something I wish to spend overlong on, I will impart this: I was not convinced at first. I was barely convinced in the end. As a vain woman, as a first time mother, the very idea was less than thrilling, for reasons that hardly need elaborating. Now that it is over, however, I am glad for it.
Whatever may have come before must be consigned to the past. The man I call husband has fathered a future Guardian. He is now one of us, through bonds of blood. And again I say, I made the right choice. I hope that, even if it is not now, Hadrian feels the same.
Written By Lys
May 3, 2018, 2:02 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
You've made your bed, Lys. Now you're going to sleep it.
Written By Cambria
May 3, 2018, 2 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Reigna
Countess Reigna Keaton was kind enough to take time out of her own busy schedule to attend to me and offer her calm and experienced presence to my husband. While it is not my habit to write in overly detailed fashion within my White Journals, it would be remiss of me, as well as purely unkind and ungrateful, not to share my thoughts here for this remarkable woman. I am more than glad that she was there, and I am proud to name her a friend to me and my House.
Written By Alessandro
May 3, 2018, 1:41 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
I have recently been learning about Shamanism in preparation for my marriage. While it began as an exploration at the behest of Blessed Vayne to allow me to gain a better understanding of my future wife’s religion has become a very intriguing exploration about a deep and rich faith.
I also cannot help but draw parallels between Shamanism and my own faith, though I have only begun to delve its mysteries. It, too, is anchored in dualities. Just as each of us have a Dark Reflection that we must distinguish in ourselves by time spent in active contemplation, so too much the mundane soul be distinguished from the free soul. Then of course, the similarities of the spirit world and the Shining Lands. It is no wonder that these two faiths have become at least somewhat integrated in some regions of Arvum.
The importance of sacrifice is intriguing as well, and while not as direct a parallel on the surface, it still bears certain similarities to aspects of the worship of Tehom. What is our Dark Reflection, if not the sacrifice of the view one may have of oneself as righteous and good, in order to not simply give into our passions, but to channel them to achieve a nobler purpose?
I also cannot help but draw parallels between Shamanism and my own faith, though I have only begun to delve its mysteries. It, too, is anchored in dualities. Just as each of us have a Dark Reflection that we must distinguish in ourselves by time spent in active contemplation, so too much the mundane soul be distinguished from the free soul. Then of course, the similarities of the spirit world and the Shining Lands. It is no wonder that these two faiths have become at least somewhat integrated in some regions of Arvum.
The importance of sacrifice is intriguing as well, and while not as direct a parallel on the surface, it still bears certain similarities to aspects of the worship of Tehom. What is our Dark Reflection, if not the sacrifice of the view one may have of oneself as righteous and good, in order to not simply give into our passions, but to channel them to achieve a nobler purpose?
Written By Luca
May 3, 2018, 1:06 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Aleksei
Don't let it go to your head, Alley Cat.
Written By Aleksei
May 3, 2018, 1:04 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
I think I've had an idea.
Written By Monique
May 3, 2018, 12:57 a.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
The Gilded Page is proud to host Master Sparte Fatchforth's 10-volume "Sigils of Arvum Reference Collection". It is a most unique and informative series! There will be a copy available for loan in the Cultural Stacks of the library, as well as copies available in the salon for purchase.
Written By Luca
May 2, 2018, 11:56 p.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Dominique
I hear Sorrel is a well-rounded party planner.
Written By Tabitha
May 2, 2018, 11:03 p.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
Relationship Note on Kenna
You're almost as excited as I am, then!
I'm not as good with words as you are, but all the lovely things you've written about me are very much returned. But of course you know that already. Anyway, I'm going to inundate you with paintings, and bake mountains of cakes for you.
(*flowers, hearts, kittens and squirrels are drawn all around the margins*)
I'm not as good with words as you are, but all the lovely things you've written about me are very much returned. But of course you know that already. Anyway, I'm going to inundate you with paintings, and bake mountains of cakes for you.
(*flowers, hearts, kittens and squirrels are drawn all around the margins*)
Written By Tabitha
May 2, 2018, 10:57 p.m.(9/2/1008 AR)
I'm having one of those weeks where I'm so excited and full of hope for the future that I can't even think of words to express how I feel. But I truly do have the best family!
Please note that the scholars may take some time preparing your journal for others to read.